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That's what I gathered too… OP comes off as ridiculously immature too so it wouldn't surprise me.
Dont listen to some of these people here. Just talk to him ask him why he wants it whats the reason there is a bigger issue why he wants it. Save the marriage don’t be an idiot
Should you? That’s totally up to you. You need to decide if this level of deceit and inconvenience is something you can tolerate. Personally, it’s naked to imagine how someone could on-line with the two of you for 2+ weeks and not figure out that you’re more than just roommates.
Okay, that's a fair point. I shouldn't probably start from my perspective. But how am I suppose to get those informations from her if she is only mad and don't want to talk for a several amount of time. What am I suppose to do? It always comes to this that I constantly ask “what's wrong?” and she replies “nothing” and eventually maybe she will tell me the truth. Its annoying
I agree with this statement. Being willing to cut your child off over this is just ridiculous in my mind. Also, it's completely disregarding the sons feelings. As a parent you're supposed to do what's best for your kid not make them pick a parent.
He said “I like your smile” and I didn't react so he apparently got angry because he rarely compliments anyone but I ignored his compliment
Are you actually married? Have you divorced her? If not, get a divorce. Take back control of your life and start living again, find someone who can help you and be honest and open with them.
You break the fuck up and get plan B
It’s especially galling bc it was a planned pregnancy. OP would have to be one hell of a trifling bitch to make hubby think they’re planning to conceive when she’s cheating and wants to pass another man’s baby off as his.
And if hubby needs a paternity test, why in the hell wouldn’t he say so prior to conception. I never understand why these dudes spring this on their wives during or right after pregnancy. What a time to have to prove you’re not a whote
We had a rather rocky start, and we've had two huge fights in those two years, but the rest of the relationship we've been very happy. I just can't bear the thought of not having her in my life at all.
Given the situation with his parents & the act that he’s committed to them not knowing that you’re living together, the “I’ll try” seems to fit naturally into that charade. Pretending that you two aren’t together is a lie he’s committed to.
But, he’s a little old to be lying this hard to his family. Do THEY know about you, or is he planning to introduce you at the wedding in May?
I’d worry less about this girl and more about the fact that he seems to be generally hiding you. Do you know any of his friends?
I probably should have told him beforehand but I don't know if what I did counts as hiding. I just feel like a terrible person right now
Please go to the police. This man is unhinged. You don't know what he might do
Your people are ridiculous. They’re blaming YOU for the fact your sister’s husband beat her up?? The same dude who started in on her while dating you?? LOL they’re all stoooooooopid
I bet none of them called the cops. Refuse to discuss it any further. If they bring it up to you again, tell them to call the cops on the person really at fault here: your sister’s husband who beat her. That’s who they should blame, not you.
Sister and her displaced guilt can get the hell on too. You’re better than me, because I would have looked her dead in the face, smiled, and said ‘You get what you get and you don’t pitch a fit’. Or ‘You made your bed, now lay in it. Roll around that bish hunnie’. Raggedy bish scabbed onto your man, now she’s got the NERVE to be pikachu-faced when the guy willing to betray his girlfriend with her own sister turns out to be a woman-beater, too? Surprise surprise I guess
why would you allow yourself to be subjected to someone as disgusting as this?
Then after more arguing she said that was an old video of her from college and that I was being aggressive and that she would never cheat.
Did you bring up the cheating or did she do that by herself?
I asked why the video was in her recent videos (1 week ago) and she said she was clearing out old photos and found that and was going to delete it.
This sounds like a load of bullshit. She was going to delete it, but she didn't delete it. Why?
Then she said I was being paranoid and unreasonable.
Did she elaborate why she said that about you? Because it doesn't sound like you did have an open and honest conversation about this. And that is the biggest red flag that I see.
her whole vibe was off last night and now it’s making me paranoid about some weird tiny things that have been happening recently.
That is your subconcious warning you that something fishy is going on. Also, breaking up with your girlfriend doesn't require a valid reason which is tested in a court of law.
I think you have enough reason to just say “Fuck this shit, I'm out of here!”. Or you could try talking to her again. Ask her directly if she will show you the video's metadata.
Please leave dude. This is a learned behavior that can be deeply ingrained. No homo but you’re basically above average and if you get her off why would she even say that? It’s cause she’s hurt for some reason or wants to control you; also willing to bet she’s been treated this same way growing up.
I had a fling with a straight up narcissist. I’m well endowed and like you I have 0 insecurities about my body except one (now more cause I got assaulted), I have a front missing tooth.
Well it’s a long story but this girl was a manipulator from the get go.
I really do treat woman I’m intimate with bad goddesses. She was a stock broker and worked during the day so while she was working I’d give her gifts. Id leave a big bag in her porch almost every day with good food, maybe something to help if she was on her moon time, wine or brews and she never had to pay for weed I always just kicked her half of whatever picked up. And then I’d write little notes to her.
She’d call me over for any number of things to help her… like she didn’t know how to reset her circuit breaker once. Another time it was to install a shower head.
Towards the end she snapped me “I’m lonely” I replied “aww can’t have you lonely! I’ll be in town the next half hour i can grab some brews and head over if you wan? I got bud…”
No reply. But that’s fine probably she’s tired or something. So i wasn’t concerned until she still didn’t text me back even a week later but would watch all my stories. Eventually I just realized okay it’s done we’re done. My bday was coming up and she definitely knew when it was.
I made her a handmade bday card that I drew that was personalized for her specifically. And wrote her a big poem for her bday and tried to make it really special. Got her all her favorite stuff, she loved it.
But I was secretly really upset cause this person I like is acting strange. Why is she watching all my stories but never replying. I sent a text once that was like “everything okay? You need anything?” A few times I dropped everything to help her in bad situations so I just figured I’d ask. Left me on read. So my birthday came snd went we hadn’t talked in two weeks or so.
My anger finally got the best of me and I said something like “you know it’s not very nice to watch all my stories but not reply to me at all.. I get it I’m ghosted but damn I wish I could just talk with you!?”
No response so i blocked and deleted her.
2 wks later she messages me over 200x back to back. I couldn’t use my phone for 2 hrs. Every single one was an insult or an attempt to hurt me. She couldn’t use dick size and she knew I didn’t think of myself as unattractive. But I had already told her what I was insecure about. My missing tooth.
So guess what 90% of those messages were about? Yup… missing tooth, and how ugly I was etc etc.
She claimed she only slept with me those times cause she was drunk and that I was creepy because of it. (I never have and never will do anything on purpose to make someone uncomfortable, In fact even during sex I ask “is this okay?” (Especially in the beginning. )And she’d say “yes omg I love it” or something to that extent. It hurt a few times and she said “owe” and I’d feel really bad and stop and I would, I didn’t care that I didn’t come, sex shouldn’t be a bad hurt ever. And the likely hood of hurting her more would increase if I kept goin. So I would stop all together.
We would drink but we were never drunk together as I usually had to drive home later or something. Unless she was wasted off of 2-3 beers and gave no physical symptoms she was not inebriated to the point she would make a decision she didn’t want to. And I’m EVERY single time I’d ask her if it was okay/if it felt good etc. I’m all about communication even if it’s awkward sometimes.
Sorry this was so long but the thing is I’ve never had any complaints or anyhrjnf even like this with ANY of my partners. I have a lot of female friends and I told them what happened and they know me really well and just thought it was awful. I realized I had said I might be moving to FL and there was the reason I think.
As much as we weren’t in a committed monogamous relationship, it very much felt like one and I think she was sad i was leaving. But she’s very much one of those people who’s scared to show weakness in any way. Even though I would have met her with grace and listened to her always and she knew this.
But no in the end it was all about control. She was hurt because the dude who was obsessed with her was moving to FL and there wasn’t anything she could do.
I would have talked through anything but getting my phone blow up with messages every two seconds for over 2 hrs every single message as hurtful as she could possibly craft it.
I wanted to respond SO BADLY. But I didn’t, I just screenshot it all and blocked/deleted.
The reason is because she finally crossed a line with me. She tried to actively hurt me as much as possible. Other messages where how much or a “loser” I was, that I’m poor and couldn’t even take her to McDonald’s etc it was all awful to hear. Cause I could never ever do that to someone even if I hated them.
I think it’s similar to her criticizing you for things you can’t control- your penis size. I’ve never had anyone go after me for that but that’s cause they know I know- it’s a blessing and a curse honestly.
But yeah I would leave her you seem so respectful and grounded she sounds like the girl I was with- becoming unable to control the situation and all this nasty stuff bubbles to the surface because of her issues.
Just remember it’s NOT you, you have a perfect cock (no homo), you’re a good guy who can communicate well, you’re a catch. Find someone who appreciates you and in the meantime find yourself more! Do some self worship!
Sorry this was so long
The only thing I really had to hide was private conversations with my mother about things I was upset with her about, plus issues with my brother who’s a drug addict that I didn’t feel comfortable sharing with her because we came from very different cultural and economic upbringings and she doesn’t handle that stuff well.
Regardless she ended up seeing everything I didn’t feel comfortable sharing with her anyway. The issue is she didn’t believe me that that’s all there was.
It’s weird, I didn’t think we have issues with trust honestly. It was really this isolated incident that just completely spiraled out of control.
I feel like the general consensus here has been to just move on anyway so I guess that’s what I must do even if I do feel as though I still love her deeply. It’s out of my control and she clearly doesn’t want me to be in her life anymore.
Bub. Get out now. A 30M with a 19F? Yeah, no. That's not a friend, that's her sugar daddy. She's not for you.
And once you've broken up, get yourself tested. You don't know where her and her sugar daddy have been. Or who else they've been with.
Thank you! Very well said. We are not trying to be harsh, some of us have unfortunately, quite the experience with toxic friends. And her asking us to tell her she’s over thinking and to suggest she ignore and be complacent of her shifty friend’s deplorable conduct did feel like she was asking us to talk her into not having a spine and being a doormat to this. We won’t do that. She’s also libel to lose her boyfriend for standing there watching her friend run him off and not standing up for him. The gods know how often we see posts crop up here from men and women who dump their partner who they felt didn’t stand up for them and have their back like they should have.
Say, “Your complaining drains me,” just like that.