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Yeah March y22, and the app happened dec y21 but didn’t find out until a little way back. Half these comments saying im uptight and overblowing it the other opposite. Guess that’s Reddit for ya
I mean it’s unfortunate but like
Why would you want to be long term with somebody who says they care about you but then when it counts doesn’t show it?
You don’t need to put up with that kind of treatment ?
Long term, I actually doubt that they will stay together. If one partner isn't near 30, I assume the relationship is doomed to fail by year 5. One needs to be close to or over 30 and be getting married for the relationship to last.
Them being early 20s – mid 20s. I have high doubts they end up together.
So her going is probably the better bet for her. And honesty she will resent him if she doesn't go. He should talk to her about it. And he would probably be better off not having her in his photos.
Either way you are right and he needs to sit and talk with her. He needs to tell her and not let this fester. He really should just let her go, but they should discuss the fact that it is just a concert and there will be more, long term what do they see as their future, and what this means for him if he would be expected to attend her events if he doesn't want to. It sucks that this means things to him. A lot of drama from what I see as nothing. But hey, take pride in your accomplishments I guess
look up george foreman
I am going off this: “After hearing how it made my partner felt, I started feeling really guilty that my lack of awareness for my actions affected my partner and how uncomfortable it was for
Not the projecting in the comments ?
People's past matters, sexual, behavioral, criminal past, achievements, successes, victories, psychological problems, good or bad. Redditors in the comments defend the cheater simply because she is a woman, if a man was the serial cheater, they would have said that you did the girlfriend a big favor. Cheaters gonna cheat.
Imagine not letting a woman know that her boyfriend SA to all his previous girlfriends because “it's not my business”.
Yes, honest it might be time to walk away. I mean if he's willing and you're willing you can try couples therapy, but a lot of people don't understand that when you do that, you both also should be going to individual therapy. Also at couples therapy things will come out that you never knew or thought of. But if that's not a solution then honest you might need to consider leaving.
I'm trying to find a way, hence the post..
Do not, I repeat, do not get rid of this baby. Keep it. He needs to get into individual therapy, and you two need to attend couples therapy. Its clear he has trauma from his youth and its all coming out now. Honestly he probably will change his mind back once he starts going. In addition, once you give birth seeing the baby might be a moment that makes him realize how he’s acting is wrong. Try to hammer home that he is not his father, he will be a great dad, that you love him, and the kid will love him. Hopefully this will not end in divorce, but if you have the baby, go to therapy, and try to help his confidence and nothing changes, you may have to. Try to give it time, though.
I hope it works out OP, I really do.
OK what? Why are you even dating anyone? You don't want holidays with your girlfriend/wife, what the hell.
You sound entitled and immature, try compromise? Hugh red flag, she needs to toss you back.
A $6.5k ring sounds more than reasonable, hell, as a woman, I kinda feel that's too much already.
She's being quite unreasonable. Maybe if you made it to like, 10 years married or something, then a more expensive eternity ring or something might be on the cards, but there is absolutely no way I'd be entertaining her demands now.
If that means she calls off the wedding, then you've dodged a bullet there.
I seem to be in the minority here, but I have had many years where I used a chamber pot under the bed. Lazy? Maybe, but not a major crime, I would have thought.
I'm a bit taken aback by how disgusting everyone seems to think this is. Now if he left it for days at a time, then I'd be revolted. But it sounds as if he cleans it up every morning. That wouldn't be an issue for me.
Oh heavens, block her number. If the gym gives you a very hot time show then her crazy messages. You're way too kind for your own good.
People are encouraged to be in relationships when healthy. You should WANT to be in a relationship once you as a person are whole. You shouldn't NEED to be in a relationship to feel whole though. It's the combination of two, stable lives coming together that make a proper relationship, not two broken parts or halves.
Get the abortion, tell him you had a miscarriage, then dump him. He's very controlling and I'd be scared to be honest with him about it.
Lol back in the day. You were such a superstar back in the day. Of what 1 year? Lol such a dumb post
No, but I do have contempt for those who try to denigrate a women to make themselves feel better. Quite a different thing entirely
There are times that feel like absolute hell… She always seems so happy from the outside but deep down she’s clearly a mess.
Mel, your GF's abusive behaviors cannot be excused — but perhaps can be explained, especially if you would speak to a psychologist in your city. They may be due to her having very weak control over her own emotions (i.e., a lack of emotional skills she had no chance to learn in childhood). My exW has that problem. If it is an issue for your GF, you likely would be seeing 4 other red flags.
The first is a strong abandonment fear. I therefore ask whether, a few months into your relationship, she started showing strong jealousy over harmless events involving other women — or tried to isolate you away from your close friends and family members? She would view your spending time with friends/family as your choosing them over her. Moreover, she usually would hate being alone by herself.
Second, you would be seeing her rely heavily on black-white thinking, wherein she tends to categorize some people as “all good” (“with me”) or “all bad” (“against me”) and will recategorize them — in just a few seconds — from one polar extreme to the other based on a minor infraction.
Because she also uses B-W thinking in judging HERSELF, she would rarely acknowledge making a mistake or having a flaw. Doing so would imply, in her mind, she is “all bad.” She thus would blame nearly all misfortunes/mistakes on you and view herself as “The Victim.”
Further, to “validate” her victim status, she would keep a detailed mental list of every infraction/mistake you ever did (real or imagined) and would not hesitate to pull out the entire list to defend herself in the most insignificant disagreement with you. Moreover, this B-W thinking also would be evident in her frequent use of all-or-nothing expressions like “you ALWAYS…” and “you NEVER….”
Third, you generally would not see her directing her anger at casual friends, coworkers, or total strangers. She usually gets along fine with them. Rather, her outbursts and temper tantrums almost exclusively would be directed against a close loved one (e.g., against you, a sibling, or her parents).
Fourth, you are convinced that she truly loves you. But you frequently see her flipping, on a dime, between Jekyll (loving you) and Hyde (devaluing or hating you) — often making you feel like you're walking on eggshells around her. Such flips would occur in a few seconds in response to some minor thing you say or do. A few hours or days later, she can flip back just as quickly.
Mel, have you been seeing strong occurrences of all 4 of these red flags?
Please do update us
Bruh have some spine and call a spade a spade…she’s been cheating on you with your mutual “friend”. They laugh at you together during their post-sex pillow talks. He comes in her mouth during the sleepover and she kisses you with those lips the next morning. He pounding your chick so hard she says she doesn’t love you anymore cause she’s thinking about him when it’s finally your turn for a ride.
Sounds similar to a guy I know. Within 6 months he had 3 accidents. Each time his dream car got repaired, then a few days later BOOM! another accident. His insurance jacked his rates up and is parents made him walk or take the bus everywhere.
It's jover, she belongs to the streets.
I read that he made plans for this trip with friends – did you feel like his asking you was an after thought? How long have you been together? Did he know you wanted to go there before he started planning the trip? Are you now friends with his friends? Do you get on with them?
Think it though, is some of why you don't want to go possibly because of those questions?
Now the big question: Do you see a future with this guy? Is he a potential partner to grow old with? This is extremely important, because if so, then you might want to consider the implications of not travelling with him. He will feel hurt that you don't want to go with him. You will be hurt he went without you, because he chose to go and now you're not seeing it with someone special. If you are not sure – then go. This trip will tell you all you need to know about a future with him.
I hear what you're saying. When you go with a big group, you end up tagging along in a big group, following a big group plan, instead of discovering beautiful places and new things, making memories with someone special. I hear you. However there is a whole life time of travels ahead of you. No matter how many times you visit a country, there will be firsts – first new areas, new things to see and do you missed out on before.
This is the answer
Must suck to now figure that out after 37 years of living ?
Uh, you have a bf who's cheated and would rather die than show you his phone. You don't find that problematic??? How big does a red flag have to be before you turn around and run??