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She is 29. With talks about getting married. Yes, she should know better. He now knows how she truly feels. Unfortunately he won't be able to shake that. Even if Reddit replies act like its no big deal, the truth is it is. We are human and online in the real world, not some Utopian theory of how relationship's should work.
This is late stage relationship collapse. She is toxically co- dependant.
This is hurting your heart. She is making you anxious to pick up the phone.
She won't help herself with you in her life, a security blanket.
It hurts to let go. But, you can get past that anxiety creeping out of the phone. It sounds like you are in a growing part of your life, and she maybe isn't. Let go. Grieve. Go forward into better times.
Have your doctor explain asthma to him.
Well, they way you talk about him it sounds like you even like him.
Seriously! Spending the holidays with your in-laws is wildly exhausting, even if you ARE close to them. Maybe she just needs a break??
You’ve been together 7 years and you don’t even live! together? Serious question, what is your goal with this man?
Troll.
We’re married it’s just not that easy
You're not violating his privacy by finding it accidentally. You're violating his privacy, and potentially humiliating him by talking to him about it. Again, it's none of your business how the guy jerks off. There's no reason for it to get in the way of your intimacy. He is masturbating. Alone. It requires no input from you.
The next day it started up again and she said I was obsessed with it and to stop planning it out. This resulted in a broken controller. Which she apologized for.
Are you saying your wife destroyed one of your possesions during a fight because she was angry?
I will tell you the same thing that i would tell a woman: violence is a deal breaker. You SHOULD leave.
It's not you and it's not your weight. Stop trying to find ways to blame yourself.
I was going to say he was asexual or had some sort of trauma in his past, but now I'm thinking gay.
Makes sense.
I feel like this is an important question to ask but are you sure it’s romantic feelings and not just strong platonic feelings? Sometimes if girls haven’t had a close guy friend before, these feelings can be confused. Try to take a closer look at your feelings first and make sure what they are before you make any further steps. Personally I wouldn’t recommend talking to him about it unless it becomes an actual problem. If you can still talk to him like normal and have a good friendship, there is no reason to bring it up. It would make things awkward and if you have no intention on acting on anything, then it does no harm. Just make sure you don’t overstep any boundaries.
Ya and tell his parents too. I feel for the girl and for you.
My dad was the same way. He has a short fuse, and bad temper at times. After spending maybe an hour or so yelling, screaming, swearing his head off, calling all kinds of names while occasionally kicking a hole in a wall, or breaking something, he’d be meek as a church mouse for a spell afterward. He never said sorry, but suddenly he would do nice things, buy gifts, etc. He is much older now, still cantankerous, but not those rip roaring outbursts that sometimes took place. I use to get sooo pissed at him growing up.
Sounds like you have both changed and this relationship clearly isn’t working for either of you.
You’re both so young, you should split up and both find someone who you can have less toxic relationships with
Some people are good at remaining friends with exes when things have ended amicably realizing that you’re better friends than lovers.
I think it actually bodes well. It shows that she’s emotionally mature and doesn’t have to burn the whole bridge and block and all that drama.
I don’t really understand why she needs to tell you that she saw her dog. If it doesn’t impact you, why is that your expectation?
thankyou so much ?
The fact that she is even entertaining this thought….. ?
Yeah definitely go for it. I’m in my 3rd year of ChemE right now and we have quite a few women in the department. I definitely think some of the guys treat them as inferior (based on what my girl friends have told me), but most aren’t like that. What engineering are you studying?
She was being disrespected by him and his actions showed he is no longer interested in building a future with her. He didn‘t consider her in big life decisions so why would he deserve to have a chance to talk things out?
This dude gives no shit and I rather tell someone that he doesn‘t rather than making her feel like she can fix things. It‘s not called being inconsiderate, it‘s called being honest. And if you read further I encouraged her to enjoy her life without him and that I know how hard it is to leave someone you love so much. Would you tell me I should stay with my ex and „cOmMuNiCAtE“ with him while he threatened to hit me several times? I don‘t think so. And I know what he‘s done is not abusive, but it shows he doesn‘t care and a relationship can only work if both people are willing to put in effort.
She deserves better than him, and what I simply did is tell her she indeed does.
Have a nice day.
You are not stuck with him, and you deserve better. I'm a man, have I ever been angry with my girlfriend of 5 years? Of course, I don't think it's possible to know someone for 5 years without being upset with them even once, let alone actually engaging in a complex emotional relationship (such as romance). Have I ever handled that anger in ways I'm not proud of? Of course I have, we're all human. I have never once gone out of my way to hurt or threaten her, and when I have hurt her unintentionally I've always felt awful. I'm not some paragon of moral righteousness, nor am I the best partner in the world, but not wanting to hurt your partner is like- the barest minimum.
This is not a man who wants the best for you, he may love you in his sense of the word, but his sense of the word is twisted and unhealthy. It isn't your fault, and you deserve better than this. I cannot imagine how scary the thought of divorce must be when you're 8 months pregnant, but this is a man you are better off not having in your life, and frankly so is your child. Your coming child has no say in much of anything, so it falls on you to provide a safe environment; that is impossible with this man in the picture. This will not change, he isn't showing you another side of him, he is showing you who he really is.
In addition to the other advice people have given regarding leaving him and reporting his behavior to the police (which is great advice), I think that it may be a good idea for you to seek counseling. Counseling may help to make the difficulties ahead a little easier to navigate, but also since you've had abusive partners in the past as well it is possible that a mental health professional could help you to develop a mental toolset that enables you to have a better idea of when someone is manipulative or otherwise abusive, even if they are hiding it.
The most important thing I want to reiterate is that you and your child deserve someone who loves you and is safe, compassionate, who cares about your well-being, and who won't threaten, manipulate, or otherwise abuse you. I wish you all the best going forward.
Leave bro. This can’t be fixed. I’m sorry, this isn’t your fault, but you have to leave now if you aren’t trying to get your feelings hurt.
I mean sure you run into attractive people on the daily, but not being able to get the thought out of your head for an entire evening seems a bit too much, no? She told me all the details in the morning so she wasn't drunk. I agree with you on the other things you said.
Thank you for telling me that. I thought it was only physical abuse that qualified. I’ll look today.