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I'm not, I just don't understand the logic of accepting and then blocking. Makes no sense to me.
Jesus Christ are your bf and my ex gf the same person lol. Same basic thing happened to me. For me it was my cousin died and I wanted her to be in the phone to comfort me and keep me company as I drove over an hour for the funeral. She hangs up half way into it and then when I say my frustrations she starts making it about her problems and completely disregarded my feelings. I’d say that’s a sign of a narcissist. I know it gets thrown around a lot but I mean come on.
Why are you on his side?
That sounds like a good idea. I might bring it up with my girlfriend, and see how she would feel about me trying it out, and then reevaluating from there. And thanks for the caution, those are some things I should consider when thinking it over.
You’re not. She isn’t your responsibility. To ease your conscious a bit you could reach out to her family or a friend but it’s really not on you at all. I have a lot of empathy for victims of abuse but regardless, that choice is still on her.
Why would she waste time on you when you weren’t interested? She moved on, do the same
True but one final conversation especially around the “you can never speak of this” is probably worthwhile. Considering in this conversation the dissolution of the relationship will be apart of it.
In that case maybe it is more sinister. But the end game is the same, if it makes you uncomfortable then end things.
Good for you OP. Time to go full momma bear ?. Almost no man is willing to go to the police, but that doesn’t mean that your former friend shouldn’t be shamed amongst your friend group. Who knows how many men have similar experiences with him but are far too ashamed to say anything. Big credit to your husband to share this with you….I might have taken it to my grave.
Tell her to go ahead and get started she literally just told you to your face that are you replaceable and she’d very quickly do so. In her head She isn’t your girlfriend and hasn’t been for awhile if she can say this and double down on it when she’s calmed down.
Take your leave and release her back to the streets sir
You’re dead wrong. He asked her. She said no. Don’t tell him to give in to her petulant behavior.
Thank you for taking the time to answer and I appreciate your feedback.
Honestly, I really do want to work on this because she makes me feel so good when we're together. The anxiety when we're apart about the things I mentioned is definitely affecting me but I think it can be worked on.
I know I am not a perfect person either and she is putting up with some of my issues. My demeanour has probably changed a lot since we first started seeing each other too – from laidback to more serious as I have a real affection and care for her.
Yes, the relationship started to be really stale and we didn’t have our own lives outside the relationship, we would come home from work and just sit in the couch and was tv shows, she tried to get me out of the house to go for a walk or told me to find some hobbies so that we could have some time apart, but I didn’t listen… I fucked it up and would do anything I get her back to show her that I can change and get out of the house more, today I’m starting going to the gym
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Your wife is not your verbal punching bag. What you have described is verbal abuse.
Idgaf how his feelings get hurt from now forward, he'll feel the same hurt I am.
This may be unpopular, but what I felt 3 years ago doesn’t always match my current feelings.
You need to talk to her, because spiraling based on 3 year old info is not rational.
Maybe because she’s manipulating. Making you promise to not break up snd then dropping a nuclear bomb isn’t a good way to build trust.
Y'all's relationships and friendships are a whole mess.
Sure it is
Oh yes – I'm not saying there's something wrong with their spelling or that it's inaccurate, just that it's often one of the many context clues that when combined with other clues points to a post being their work!
Since you live! in the same building anyway, is it possible for him to split time between your place and his mother's place?
It will give all three of you a chance to transition.
So I have a husband with ADHD who I suspect might have AUT. I have issues with him on getting him to go for better jobs or at least get a side gig that will make additional money since he bitches all the time about money. He claims he doesn't want to do a side gig because he sees no need for it (which WTF). He cries a lot about being burned out but only works 20-30 hours a week at his remote job.
I encourage him a lot to shake up routines – he's very resistant about it. He acts like the world will end if we make any drastic changes in routine.
How much of it is the diagnosis and how much of is it excuses?
Yea. I have never tied boots up that weren't on my feet
Whaaat? You are perfect. Dump this pos.
Bro she lied about being raped. There is very few things worse then that. Women have a nude enough time after actually being assaulted women like her make things harder for actual victims.
So what am I supposed to DO?
If I give them all the space that they want and then barely talk to them, they will think I am not interested in them at all and then they will ghost me anyway. But if I do my usual thing then I am coming off too strong and then I am a creep and a weirdo. I can NEVER win. There is NO IN BETWEEN!!!!
Why are you still with him? It won't get better it will get worse.
A good partner is someone who would listen to you when you say that you're upset or hurt about him calling you something because they love you and don't want to cause you distress. This is not the case for him.
He sounds like one of those prank guys that eventually takes things too far while saying “It's just a prank bro.” when someone ends up seriously hurt, ends up punching him, or calling the cops. Jokes and pranks are only funny if everyone thinks it's funny. If you don't like it then it's clearly not a joke to you.
In the title you call it verbal abuse. Do you really want to stay with someone who verbally abuses you? More often than not it eventually shifts to emotional abuse and sometimes physical abuse. I never saw myself as someone who'd ever be with an abuser, but I was with him for over 10yrs. It wasn't until I started therapy that I saw just how bad things had gotten. Don't put yourself in a position for someone to slowly break you down. It's better to be alone and happy than to suffer from their “love.”
Get on the internet. Find some foot porn. Make a note of some of the things that they do.
Try them with your husband and see which ones you both have fun with.
What question about your relationship are you asking for advice on?
This is not an equal relationship by any means, there is no give and take, she is only taking for all the times you say she's amazing I can see nothing about how she puts any effort into the relationship at all ever. It's all just promises about change but no action. Time to move on, you've done everything and she is doing sweet fuck all
Isn't one of the rules in these groups that you don't talk about it to the guys posted?
If he isn’t willing to cut immediate contact then that tells you everything.
This is, according to him, a “third grade crush.” You are his WIFE. This isn’t rocket science. He knows the right thing to do. He just isn’t willing to do it – and that’s a message to YOU, even if he won’t acknowledge or own up to it out loud.
You can’t force him to do something he doesn’t want to do. You can only choose your own actions, and based on what you’ve described you either learn to online with your husband allowing himself to fall in love with another woman with your enablement, or you leave.
Let’s be real he didn’t tell you because you are anti kid AND you probably aren’t the first woman this kid has bullied. You are being bullied by a kid.
But most importantly HE LIED TO YOU. You aren’t in love with him because it wasn’t really him. You are in love with a lie.
You’re not the problem in the situation when you tell somebody what you need OK, your partner it’s a very vulnerable place to be at. And what he did is rubbed uour nose in it . Frankly I think you have got some bigger problems with him and I’m so sorry you’re going through this, but you were not a prude. Any woman would have a problem with their man at a bachelor party. That kind of thinking went out with the 60s in the last century. I’m actually very proud of your behavior. If every woman did this with the behaviors around their men, men would have to change what they do.
There was a post at one point on Reddit from some strippers that did bachelor parties, and they said they were full of every kind of bad behavior you can think of and then some I don’t know where it’s at though.