Now is the time to get a lawyer to ensure you have no parental responsibilities and possibly a restraining order. Even moving to another country will likely not stop any legal action affecting you, which should be your main concern now.
Oh wow. Yeah, you know what needs to happen. Get therapy! You have codependency issues that seem to stem from something far and long ago in your life. Broken household, perhaps? Seek a therapist AND leave that toxic relationship.
Best of luck, she does not deserve you. And you don't deserve her.
This is nothing more than a self care routine for you and clearly an important part of your life. I'd set one final boundary. Reexplain the importance, tell him you WILL NOT change this and you're tired of defending it. He either gets on board or you aren't sure what the future looks like. That seems harsh but seriously because if he doesn't you'll either alwaaaaays be defending this or you'll sacrifice something important to you.
thank you this is all super helpful. we have discussed and we’re both looking for something long term but of course don’t want to be too hasty. we have said we’re not currently seeing anyone else. but i would assume that at this point it’s not technically “against the rules” to do so, but it would for sure hurt the other person. and i personally have no desire to see anyone else as it is.
you are probably right. it just feels like sort of a moral dilemma. i want to choose whatever option will lead to the least amount of hurt/drama. i guess i’d rather just save that as a last resort. i definitely have to, and will, prioritize myself. i guess id rather not have to bring it up unless it’s affecting me to a really serious degree. even though you’re right it probably would be for the best, i’m just too scared lol
I don’t know we just aren’t but I’m thinking of getting one behind her back
Now is the time to get a lawyer to ensure you have no parental responsibilities and possibly a restraining order. Even moving to another country will likely not stop any legal action affecting you, which should be your main concern now.
Is that advice or are you just trying to make her feel bad.
As someone who has gotten pregnant over the course of her life three separate times whilst on three different forms of birth control… USE THE CONDOMS.
Some people are just really goddamned fertile. Also nothing is 100%.
Oh wow. Yeah, you know what needs to happen. Get therapy! You have codependency issues that seem to stem from something far and long ago in your life. Broken household, perhaps? Seek a therapist AND leave that toxic relationship.
Best of luck, she does not deserve you. And you don't deserve her.
This is nothing more than a self care routine for you and clearly an important part of your life. I'd set one final boundary. Reexplain the importance, tell him you WILL NOT change this and you're tired of defending it. He either gets on board or you aren't sure what the future looks like. That seems harsh but seriously because if he doesn't you'll either alwaaaaays be defending this or you'll sacrifice something important to you.
So how has your situation progressed? Are you still together?
thank you this is all super helpful. we have discussed and we’re both looking for something long term but of course don’t want to be too hasty. we have said we’re not currently seeing anyone else. but i would assume that at this point it’s not technically “against the rules” to do so, but it would for sure hurt the other person. and i personally have no desire to see anyone else as it is.
you are probably right. it just feels like sort of a moral dilemma. i want to choose whatever option will lead to the least amount of hurt/drama. i guess i’d rather just save that as a last resort. i definitely have to, and will, prioritize myself. i guess id rather not have to bring it up unless it’s affecting me to a really serious degree. even though you’re right it probably would be for the best, i’m just too scared lol