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  1. Absolutely not! DO NOT push the subject further. You both will have some feelings of resentment fester in your relationship and that’s not a good thing to do.

    She did ask your opinion, but if it’s money that she is named as the sole beneficiary, she gets to choose ultimately what to do with it.

    I understand your perspective OP, I sincerely do and I personally agree that it would only make sense. However, it ultimately is her decision.

    Estate laws are rather specific depending on where you online, and I have worked in estate law myself.

    Where I am located, the named beneficiary does not have to share anything with their spouse regardless of the amount of consideration ($).

    If those two people were to end their marriage, the person that received the gift (provided it’s in a separate and unshared account), the sum would not be considered in the equalization as it was gifted to them alone.

    Perhaps, you could suggest an alternative solution to avoid further quarrels about the subject of dividing it between the three kids. You can encourage her to put the money into spousal RRSPs considering she’s a SAHM for the time being, or tax free savings account, or she can invest it for her own benefits.

    If you aren’t hurting financially, then a gentle suggestion to do something else with it might be a better option.

    You can tell her you have concerns that in a few years when your son is getting ready for post secondary school, he might feel resentful towards her (and you might as well) creating a wedge with their relationship. He might feel betrayed by a woman that has been a second mother to him that he’s adored and might question if she’s only been playing nice. These are all valid concerns, and he might in turn feel resentful towards his siblings.

    I will repeat myself, do not push for the equal split. That is likely to not work well in your favour. Instead, dissuade with other options of investing in herself now (education) or her future (retirement).

  2. Apparently it's not uncommon to develop (or develop further) allergies in adulthood. I was never allergic to shrimp until I was around 20, I've ALWAYS loved shrimp. I got tested and found out I was allergic to that and scallops. Was tested again about 4 years later and my allergy to them had increased a bit (still nowhere near death levels, just get a bit red and eyes swell up for a few hours if I don't take anti allergic meds)

  3. Hello /u/greyapplesdontexist,

    Your post was removed for the following reason(s):

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  4. I’m sorry OP. I can’t even fathom this happening. I’m not gonna lie when reading this I get the impression your fiancés brother needs your fiancés attention and seems to coincidentally have these panic attacks when he won’t. Maybe this is a blessing in disguise.

  5. You’ve been inappropriate. 100%. You are in the wrong. You were friends. He is married. For fucks sake you were friends with his wife.

    What were you thinking? He say it back and stay with you and leave his wife? How could you. That’s so fucked.

    Leave this happy couple alone. Clark seems like a catch and I’m glad he did the right thing. You broke trust. There is no going back.

    Stop contacting these people and get some therapy.

    Seriously. Way to be the cliché.

  6. OP said he gave her a $2k MacBook for Christmas. It’s not like he’s not financially supporting her. At some point you got to look at the individual if you’re 25 and don’t have $1,200 in savings.

  7. Yeah people know what the law is, they also know what is mad sus. Merely saying this might not be the best place for you to stand up for your beliefs.

  8. I sense that you want the breakup to be drama-free and easy. Which it won't be. But it NEEDS to be done. Do it in person, but in public. Tell her “This relationship isn't working for me any longer. I wish you the best. Then leave. Block her # if she starts blowing up your phone, but do NOT take responsibility for how she responds to the breakup.

    You deserve to be in a relationship that you enjoy – this one isn't it.

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