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He is not a keeper, he is whatever the opposite is. You deserve better. You deserve so much better. The fact that he has you questioning if you are the asshole is extremely horrific. You are not his sex toy. You are not his maid. You would not let your daughter be treated like this. You should be his ex.
Maybe counseling. And if not being married is a not negotiable as a long-term plan, evaluate your alternatives to supporting yourself and what the option would be to on-line separately.
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“I'm going to leave my wife” X 1000 and doesn't do it.
He ain't leaving. Move on.
OP, you were groomed at 16 by an adult. That is disgusting, and now his even older brother is trying to fuck you. Please come to your sense and escape these people.
Right? Reading his post, he's like “she wants me to spend a few hours with her every weekend! Can you believe these demands?!”
Dude, a few hours is just watching a movie or two together over the span of 2 days you have off work. If that's too much for you, the relationship is already long dead.
You’re never gonna make sense of it, so stop trying to psychoanalyse him.
It might be that he was fine with her being there occasionally, but then she was there too much for his liking. He might have not liked her showering there or using the electricity, he might have just grown to not like her personality.
It really doesn’t fucking matter.
Also, people rent because someone is apparently willing to pay $400 for a futon in a living room and they like having money in their bank account.
Well what's actually happening?
It's a sunken cost fallacy.
Don't keep investing just because you've already invested 2 years.
Take both cats. Divide them up. Or give both to him.
Pick an option.
Shit like this turns into strong resentment the longer it goes on.