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Honestly, I’d want him in individual therapy and couples therapy before I’d take him back.
If you bought a house would you let your bf online there without paying anything?
3rd time it’s been posted today
You agreed to some kinds of cheating with no way to monitor the actual extent of it. Then, you were lied to about the actual extent of it. Ultimately, however, something or other happened that your wife finally regretted.
The question now, it seems to me, is, What does she want next? Does she still have enough of a commitment to you and to your daughter for this relationship to be worth trying to save? How much more of this are you willing to put up with, and, realistically, what are your other options?
She's an asshole for visiting him.
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Yeah he replied to my comment with something along the lines of “this is a throwaway, I’m not going to use exact ages,” but deleted it before I could point out the multiple flaws in his mental gymnastics routine.
Make him picture that he could literally be her father…! If this will not be enough, ask him to picture HIS daughter at her age, being intimate with an older guy, of his actual age…!
She doesn’t want children. So what’s the difference in her being in a relationship at 35 vs 45?
I don't know. I want to. I updated my post with lots more info. The break is in the hopes of things working out better since we argue so much. I've spent a lot of time looking after his kids (early on) by myself – five kids alone – so I was surprised that when I just asked for two days alone, that it would be unreasonable to him (without stopping him enjoying time with them). I even suggested local mini theme parks and activities that would be fun for the day.
Don’t stop knowing more things, but do learn more about how to say it.
Learn from David Hume, or Dale Carnegie (How To Win Friends And Influence People) or The Art Of Conversation.
A better response would have been to leave it at ‘I have not heard of that before.’ In time, your partner will hear this as a polite way of saying that it might not be true, better check it up.
The philosophers of old (Plato and such) used to say ‘I don’t understand’ instead of ‘You are talking bollocks’. Much easier to keep having a civil discussion after that.
America seems to be very competitive and macho, so saying such seemingly self-deprecating things might be perceived as weakness rather than strength. Might take some time to find the balance that suits the culture there.
Sounds like a fwb
Right? OP and the original commenter is acting like it's naked to find people who haven't cheated to be friends with LOL. I don't know very many people that have cheated. I know a few, and none of them are my friends, nor do I associate with them
Its only been 2 weeks and he is already cheating on his potential bride with you?.
I dont think you are the 1st woman he has been doing and saying this to.
So OP can act violent towards her BF, and his response is what is at fault.
Fuck off.
Maybe OPs BF is a creep, but that doesn’t mean OP is any better. Ffs this isn’t even the first time she has pretended to do something violent towards him, and he reacted the same way the first time.
We haven't had sex, he wants to wait till marriage, but thank you on your input!
I still think that's sketchy. For all we know, he went through their phones to get them or they were sent to him from these girls' boyfriends or smth. We have no idea how the photos were acquired.
And if we do assume they were sent of their own free will to him from these girls, that doesn't mean they know they were saved. On the odd occasion I've sent nudes, I didn't want them saved to their phones (or laptop in this case) and I know plenty of people who feel the same way as me.
OPs best bet imo is to gather as much information as possible and confront/talk to him about it. If anything about how he acts is sketchy, I'd personally attempt to delete the folders and contact the other women to make them aware of the folders just in case they weren't already.
Do you really want to be just his friend? Really?
No, he's not. He lied and said that he was single because he wanted to be single. You gave him what he wanted.
My guess is that things with the new girl blew up in his face when she realized that he's a lying pig and if he can lie and cheat on you that he'd do it to her as well.
On a personal note: My dad died in 2021 and it was really hot I was in school, I have 2 kids, and I had to do all the handling of his body to the funeral home, and his funeral. My husband was my rock so his saying that tines were naked and he lost himself while you were going through the loss of your dad is disgusting and just showing you more how he cares about himself more than you.
You've been hooking up with a very hot woman for a couple of months. You have been having great sex but you really don't know that much about her.
Stop jumping to conclusions, stop making plans for the rest of your life for now and just talk to her. Find out who she really is. You are going to find out everything you need to know by actually getting to know her, not from Reddit. And it's going to take some time.
Then you can decide if you want to go for that ride or not.
Look at all these people trying to shame this man by saying he’s a manchild, cheating, etc. he was just dealing with some things he was ashamed of and didn’t know how to communicate to his wife. Sometimes things can be very hot on a guy and he just needs his wife to be understanding and supportive. Im so glad you were able to resolve it and work it out together.
He is a 40 something year olds loser that takes no accountability and responsibility. Yet he wanted a daughters but doesn’t bother helping with childcare and puta on a fake persona in front of other people. He is an undercover, unchecked pedo that didn’t get his little girls. Thankfully. Leave him. He is a sick man that needs to be on a watchlist when he knocks someone else up.
I know you have a hunger to have your voice heard but everything you said has been addressed and said by a million other people. I deleted my comments because this side discussion reached toxic levels that is taking away from helping the OP.
Who would want to be serious with you?
You're both mental