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How old is he?
His statement is grounds for a divorce in my opinion.
Names can be carried on via the next generation they can skip 1 or multiple generations. They don’t have to be direct.
His attitude and response are disgusting
Cuddling someone of the opposite sex while they're in nothing but a towel is not a “stretch”.
This!?
Your husband is lying to you ?
The entire situation is icky, at best. Phones don't pick and choose which messages to delete, that's absolute bollocks.
Okay. First thing is she broke her ethical code. She might be doing a masters but she is a manipulative idiot. Don’t fall for the heeby jeeby nonsense designed to take power over you. Tell her she is clearly a narcissist and to work on herself before dispensing advice. She isn’t supposed to discuss anyone’s mental problems and intruded into your room without permission. Put a lock on your door and tell her to get her head seen to. She knows your secrets, so they are not secrets anymore. Accept these. From now on do not engage with her. Tell her that you will report her behaviour to her academic tutor.
No cheaters “deserve” a second chance. She selfishly chose this. Being remorseful after the fact means next to nothing unless you plan to reconcile. She can't unfuck her affair partner, of undue any other betrayal committed during her affair. If you're gonna reconcile, do so because you think you'd be better off fixing things with her, then you would elsewhere.
Reconciliation is a gift. It's in no way an obligation.
You're welcome. Domestic physical abuse is perpetrated equally by both men and women, it's more spoken about when men do it because they usually do more damage. Take this seriously, because a loved one should never lay a hand on you in anger (not that anyone else should).
You need to look at your situation as though your being a friend to yourself. Would you accept a friend being treated like this? I think we all forget to put our own well being first at times and it often doesn't work out well.
I feel like an abuser.
You threw a bottle at and then tried to hit someone who was driving. You are.
Do you think his reaction is fine?
No, anyone who does what you did could do it again. He should run before he actually gets hurt.
OP needs actual friends. These are just “people she knows.”
But if you all do that what does your fiancé do
You are very intuitive! I actually recently started counseling to work on boundaries. I have been enabling him in many ways by “trying to be a good wife” but basically just being a doormat. The financial situation hadn’t really occurred to me since it’s just something that has to get done.