Yeah that's she needs to stop plunging it behind his back and let him flood the bathroom with shit water. Then he can clean it up himself. Honestly, he would probably force her to do it anyway.
Please head the advice you're being given here. Your situation sounds very serious.
Emotional abuse and manipulation is like a frog in boiling water. If you out the frog in a pot of water and slowly raise the temperature, it doesn't feel it. It doesn't know it's being boiled alive until it's too late. I know this because I've lived it. By the time you realize how bad things are you're in such a state of mindfuck that you don't know what to do, don't want to believe it's really that bad.
Please look out for yourself and your child. And do not let him see this post.
Stay safe, update if you can. I'll be thinking of you
It feels disrespectful because he’s treating you like a pupil rather than an equal. He’s assuming you don’t know anything rather than asking if you understand, therefore putting him up intellectually and putting you down as a result. This is one of the reasons I broke up with my last boyfriend, because I tried talking to him so many times only for him not to listen time and time again. If this is a habit then it’s probably not going to change, sorry.
It’s only one week. You can make it 7 days without talking to her. Pour your energy into work and hobbies and school and whatever else you have going on. Do not contact her again this week under any circumstances (barring a real, actual, non-emotional-or-mental emergency). Shit off your phone for a while; it’s good for you anyway. Watch some movies, listen to some music, make something. Cook. But just turn off your phone and get some space from her. It will be good for you too, not just her.
Also I think 1 week is a bit short, but you guys are young so you’re probably obsessed with each other. That’s fine. If you need to work through your feelings for her, write a letter in your journal to her (do not send it). Put on some music and have a good cry if you need to. Take a naked shower and do some self-care with a nice moisturizer or scrub or sth.
You have a lot of options. Just DONT CONTACT HER. It will be better for you, for her, and for your relationship if you can have some independence and not require her presence to regulate your emotional life. You got this.
I am proud of it. Maybe I just feel like since this milestone will be accomplished, I'm running out of societal milestones. Next one is kids. Sometimes I don't feel ready to be an adult even though I've been one for 11 years
Thank you for sharing your experience with things like this as a guy. I agree! It never occured to me that it's manipulate but now that you point it our, I see that. It's a horrible foundation for a relationship.
No, she says she ready she just wants me to “step up”
Tell your so…. if she finss out u knew when this all goes bad she will be pissed.
Sucks she has no class, but that is a fact
Yeah that's she needs to stop plunging it behind his back and let him flood the bathroom with shit water. Then he can clean it up himself. Honestly, he would probably force her to do it anyway.
Please head the advice you're being given here. Your situation sounds very serious.
Emotional abuse and manipulation is like a frog in boiling water. If you out the frog in a pot of water and slowly raise the temperature, it doesn't feel it. It doesn't know it's being boiled alive until it's too late. I know this because I've lived it. By the time you realize how bad things are you're in such a state of mindfuck that you don't know what to do, don't want to believe it's really that bad.
Please look out for yourself and your child. And do not let him see this post.
Stay safe, update if you can. I'll be thinking of you
It feels disrespectful because he’s treating you like a pupil rather than an equal. He’s assuming you don’t know anything rather than asking if you understand, therefore putting him up intellectually and putting you down as a result. This is one of the reasons I broke up with my last boyfriend, because I tried talking to him so many times only for him not to listen time and time again. If this is a habit then it’s probably not going to change, sorry.
Not just respect but a ton of gratitude. He should cut them out of his life
There is no point of staying in a marriage where you aren’t loved or appreciated, believe me
It’s only one week. You can make it 7 days without talking to her. Pour your energy into work and hobbies and school and whatever else you have going on. Do not contact her again this week under any circumstances (barring a real, actual, non-emotional-or-mental emergency). Shit off your phone for a while; it’s good for you anyway. Watch some movies, listen to some music, make something. Cook. But just turn off your phone and get some space from her. It will be good for you too, not just her.
Also I think 1 week is a bit short, but you guys are young so you’re probably obsessed with each other. That’s fine. If you need to work through your feelings for her, write a letter in your journal to her (do not send it). Put on some music and have a good cry if you need to. Take a naked shower and do some self-care with a nice moisturizer or scrub or sth.
You have a lot of options. Just DONT CONTACT HER. It will be better for you, for her, and for your relationship if you can have some independence and not require her presence to regulate your emotional life. You got this.
Should’ve thought about that before having kids with someone that didn’t like the kid you HAD
I am proud of it. Maybe I just feel like since this milestone will be accomplished, I'm running out of societal milestones. Next one is kids. Sometimes I don't feel ready to be an adult even though I've been one for 11 years
Thank you for sharing your experience with things like this as a guy. I agree! It never occured to me that it's manipulate but now that you point it our, I see that. It's a horrible foundation for a relationship.