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You have a right to be distant. Girlfriend is being sketchy with being annoyed/angry at you for questioning what her and J were debating about. Keep your eyes and ears open in regards to them both, but especially her.
I'm not sure there's a happy compromise here. Neither of you are wrong or need to change or compromise on this. It's a fundamental difference and unfortunately, you two are not compatible.
I'm sorry, I know that's probably not what you want to hear, but there's no sense in either of you sacrificing your happiness only to find out it's not going to work once it's too late. Good luck!
You are completely right!
?? Together a year and alrdy engaged and have a kid. No problems here
Those are the absolute worst. They feel entitled and untouchable. This makes them extremely dangerous. Maybe he just meant that you’d miss him, but that not the vibe I’m getting.
Do you have any support system like parents or close friends, even if not close by? Bring them all up to speed with what’s going on and what he has said, as well as the details of the upcoming break up. He’s already issued a threat – I expect his next reaction may be worse. If possible, record the interaction. You can set your phone to start recording a voice memo and keep it close by, just make sure it’s in a public place. Honestly, if I were in your position I’d end this one via phone call. Still try to record it, however it’s done.
I’d find it extremely odd that someone was in my bedroom when there was no legitimate reason to be. The husband’s reaction would make me really suspicious. If she’s gone to get something or he didn’t know then he’d have answered. So there’s another reason and it’s one he doesn’t want to share with the OP. I’d be asking my mum and getting a camera.
You know these aren't the only options right? You don't have to leave. You can tell her you are going to file and SHE needs to leave
You compromise over things like what to eat for dinner. Or where to go on vacation. Or whose family do we spend the holiday with. Those are things that bring you temporary happiness not true happiness. You can’t compromise your way to happiness. The things that are important to you (you mention children) are not negotiable because without them you won’t be happy. Finances are another thing that you must be in agreement on. Money management influences your sense of security. If your money isn’t properly managed then you may feel less secure. For others spending money is security. Without security you can’t be happy. There are some things for which there is no happy middle ground. For these things, compromise leaves one or both people unhappy.