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If it was only friends catching up why did she hide it from you?
Yep, I can see that. But if she’s the one telling him what is being messaged to her, but then not telling him the whole story, that just escalates reactions like the ones OP described. And if she is afraid of OPs reaction, she should break up with him, not hide shit. If a person can’t be honest with their partner they have no business dating them.
Your GF seems a little self centered. She expects her wants and needs to be met and your wants and needs are not important if they interfere with what she wants. She may always prioritize what she wants over what you want.
In any relationship there is some give and take on both sides. Normally it isn't so one sided. Individuals have different needs; some need a lot of social interaction and togetherness while others prefer some solitude or time spent separately in individual pursuits. Neither is wrong, but the other person needs to understand that compromise is a must.
Do not expect her to change. If you stay with her, accept her as she is. People who think the other will change are usually disappointed.
You’re welcome! I hope two can find a happy compromise
He's an immature child who doesn't respect you.
Just talk to him. Communication is the answer!! Whatever it might be just TALK. Building assumptions in your mind will wreck you. And if he is cheating then leave him ASAP. If he's true he'll come clean about this.
You can forgive her without getting back together with her. What makes you think she won’t do it again?