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No, I have no personal experience being treated the way youāre treating your boyfriend, fortunately. It just bothers me when I read about someone who appears to be a lovely, nude working person being talked down about and disrespected by someone who is supposed to love them. I think that bothers most people. And Iām pretty unconvinced by your backtracking, after stating clearly you expect him to financially support you and that you think heās ānot the brightestā.
You moved across the globe for them, so they apparently owe you this MMA thing.
Not just that. I gave up a damn good job I loved too, and replaced it with a soul crushing dead end one I despise. I gave up my financial security for it too.
You do a lot as a partner, but saying that they are “step* kids” and not fully your responsibility is cruel
I am not saying anything she hasn't said. She is the one who insists that we keep it all “proper”. I try and involve myself in a decision about their lives, I'm essentially told to butt out because I'm not their bio dad.
She cannot have it both ways.
You aren't willing to compromise and change. Therefore, you are not treating her as a partner.
When is it her turn to compromise and change, exactly? Why is it 100% on me?
I'll see what I'll do. Thanks.
He is abusing you. Putting you down is the first step. He needs you to feel so worthless that you wonāt leave because you feel like you canāt do better
The fact that heās said he has to restrain himself from getting physical is all you need to know about the future of your relationship. Heās working up to that, itās the next phase. He 1,000% will hit you in the future.
This is how abuse works. It goes in stages. The first step is to seem perfect. Then the verbal abuse/ breaking you down. Then physical. Plus we wonāt even touch on financial abuse, which heās also setting the stage to make you financially dependent on him. That is another layer that will make it harder for you to leave.
Get out NOW while you still can.
This is very much divorce worthy. Yep.
There are zero parts of this sentence after ābecauseā that are ok.
Not sure of the specifics, but you are legally married right? Get a lawyer first. Even if all the assets are in her name, don't you have some right to them?
thank you so much ;), will let you know how it went
āShe loves meā
Oh suuuure, spitting on you, sending you to jail, hating your daughter, and trying to ruin your reputationā¦ she ālovesā you soooooo much.
Wake the fuck up!
NTA
You asked him privately. He's the one who made a scene.
Why did he make a scene? Because he was high on coke.
This reminds me a lot of this one story my vet teacher shared with us about the frustration of the vet field when dealing with patients who have extremist views that extend to their animals. People like your girlfriend who only believe in natural remedies, vegans who will put their carnivorous pets on a full veggie only diet, etc.
He actually had a woman come in screaming about how her cat was growing thinner and when asked about the diet the lady was like āoh well he eats salads with meā
Your girlfriend is not a vetāthank god for that by the way. Unless your dogs doctor says to stop giving your dogs certain medicines thereās no reason to stop.
Your girlfriend has also shown she clearly cannot handle being denied or having her viewpoints challenged.
And when they are challenged she grows violent and aggressive.
Is that really the kind of person you want to subject your dogs or even future kids to?
Just think about that, and if the answer is leaving her to be a lonely spawn of Satan then thatās the correct answer.
Iāve expressed my concerns about him being on a base states away where I donāt really know what heād be doing all the time
If you are this insecure, this is not the relationship for you. Probably most relationship won't be for you until you deal with that insecurity. You don't have to 'know what your partner is doing all of the time'. That is suffocating and controlling behavior. In therapy you will learn that 2 individuals within a relationship should have their independence, their autonomy, the ability to function independently from their partner, that they have the right to privacy, to have friends outside of the relationship, that their jobs will require them to be present and actively engaged to those job functions and not on the phone reassuring their partner that they are indeed at work, etc. Then add the military dynamic. What are you going to do when he gets deployed for a year? Demand he wear a tracking device (which would never be allowed)? Therapy can also help to diagnose other areas that may be helpful for you to work on.
maybe I will be the unpopular opinion here but I think he just got impressed by how much she can stand her ground however much she developed feelings for him meanwhile. She maybe told him at the very first second that she won't sleep with him until they become official. So they had the time to get to know each others, 2 years are enough for that, they got to love each others, so they are together. That lady stood strong, sticked to her words, and she got the man with it, and she became the only one, who didn't immediately gave herself to him like everyone else, including OP did.
OP, go get a life, because based on your other posts and on your comments overall, you seem to be nothing but a thirsty stalker.
Sorry for being this harsh on you, but you don't seem to understand others' respectful comments as well. Please grow some self respect.
I think your dad is a bit odd and possibly not quite right in regards to how he views you and I think your mum knows that.
Which begs the following question; why would she let him around you or leave you alone with him as a child, and why would she not leave him or report him if she felt anything unusual?
I think your mum is projecting her insecurities and suspicions onto you so she doesn't have to fully face the fact that her husband is inappropriate.
Also, if you watch the movie Precious – there is a scene where the mother blames her daughter for the fathers sexual abuse and the mother was jealous of it. It was gross. Perhaps your mother is jealous and also projecting because she feels she can't leave your dad.
I think your mum thinks she is protecting you by sleeping in the same bed and reprimanding you, however, all she is doing is blaming you for her sick husband.
Whatever the reason, I hope you get out of that house soon.