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“I'm sorry I said those things to you, I understand why it hurt you”
it's not for me but damn, this is exactly how I would've liked people to apologise to me rather than, sorry it offended you
Great advice
I would discuss it beforehand so she doesn't feel blindsided. It could be that she is simply oblivious to how you feel and just assumes that you want to pay. I'd say something like, “I really enjoy you and our time together and I want to keep going out, I just can't financially swing being the one who pays for both of us all the time. Could we either split the tab 50/50 or alternate who pays each week?” Something along those lines.
No, you probably can't be “just friends” with someone you still want a future with. That's part of the reason I'm saying leave her be to give yourself space to get over it.
A therapist can help you cope with grieving the loss of this relationship. If you're still stuck thinking “I want her back” nine months after the relationship ended, you might benefit from some help to work through it and eventually accept that it's over.
The train ticket with return only cost me €200 but It would cost me at least €600 more to go there (4 nights hotel and food and if I want to buy myself anything cute then more likely closer to €1k) and I’ll be mostly wandering around alone and there’s a garbage strike. I mean I’m sure I can find something lovely in Paris but I’m also ready to cut my loses at this point ?