I mean, she deserves to be living her life and have her schedule worked around too… Seems unlikely to me that she's doing archery for 12 hrs of her day.
Yes, I am, so that we can have a healthier and more balanced relationship. I understand that everyone has their hobbies and interests, but when it becomes an addiction that starts affecting other aspects of their life, including our relationship, then it becomes a problem that needs to be addressed.
Lol well I understand why. People here on reddit can call everyone insecure but in the end most people, men or women, don't want their SO to have a “best friend” of the opposite sex. It can cause a lot of unwanted drama and the fact that you provided no context (we dont know how “close” you are with your male “best friend” and what exactly do you do with him) is sus. Huge red flag to me.
You stated there are periods where you and your friend talk all the time. That kind of emotional intimacy depending on the level can be problematic to a relationship.
I was giving an insight into the undulations of frequency over the course of the entire friendship. Over the past year, it's a 3-5 text conversation every couple of weeks.
How does she feel about you having female friendship in general?
She absolutely hates it. When we've talked about it in the past, it's absolutely irrelevant that it's platonic, the length and duration of the friendship, the distance she is living away, the fact we've only ever texted during the friendship. For her, it simply boils down to 'she's a girl'.
This is the mother of your child, I understand principle but I do find it weird how willing you are to throw a deep relationship w/ a kid for a friendship.
Quite honestly, I want to spend the rest of my life with her. She has flaws, but so does everyone. And outside of this issue alone, in my eyes she is perfect. I absolutely adore her, and my child. But this issue has been a thorn for the entire 4 years, and I'm tired of it.
I've screwed up by lying. That's on me and I'll have to deal with the consequences of that. Having a friend, whether they're male or female, isn't wrong though and I shouldn't be demonized for it. And cutting her off isn't the right thing to do even if it does cost the relationship.
I mean even if I can just get him on the phone I feel like he’s eventually explain to me what happened. This was just very out of character and not him
That's wild. I would never do this to a SO. That's a type of blow to confidence that will randomly pop up in the back of your head forever. Pretty inconsiderate imo. It'd be different if you purchased it. People these days are just … Sigh
Op you deserve someone to be considerate of your feelings and who appreciates and craves your body for you. Don't feel like you are less because she was being selfish in this matter. And I hope you can resolve it and put the newly crafted insecurity away eventually.
Are you actually wanting advice in order to actually do something about your relationship or are you just here to rant about your bf again?
I mean, she deserves to be living her life and have her schedule worked around too… Seems unlikely to me that she's doing archery for 12 hrs of her day.
Those are not your friends!!!
Lol. If she gonna meet up with an ex/friend to say goodbye. You should have joined, like adults. You are definitely the second choice here.
Free yourself from this.
Updateme
Yes, I am, so that we can have a healthier and more balanced relationship. I understand that everyone has their hobbies and interests, but when it becomes an addiction that starts affecting other aspects of their life, including our relationship, then it becomes a problem that needs to be addressed.
I don't really think living together or not would change anything
because having more opportunities to do X never increases the chance of doing X, amirite?
Fuck that. Their 35 year old son is threatening to show up to their daughter’s wedding in a clown suit. If they don’t support you handling that swiftly and decisively, they can fuck off too. And if OP’s fiancée has a problem with that, then OP shouldn’t marry her.
Imagine the life of bullying OP will have to deal with from his fiancée’s family if he lets this slide? He needs to establish that he is in charge here.
Lol well I understand why. People here on reddit can call everyone insecure but in the end most people, men or women, don't want their SO to have a “best friend” of the opposite sex. It can cause a lot of unwanted drama and the fact that you provided no context (we dont know how “close” you are with your male “best friend” and what exactly do you do with him) is sus. Huge red flag to me.
You stated there are periods where you and your friend talk all the time. That kind of emotional intimacy depending on the level can be problematic to a relationship.
I was giving an insight into the undulations of frequency over the course of the entire friendship. Over the past year, it's a 3-5 text conversation every couple of weeks.
How does she feel about you having female friendship in general?
She absolutely hates it. When we've talked about it in the past, it's absolutely irrelevant that it's platonic, the length and duration of the friendship, the distance she is living away, the fact we've only ever texted during the friendship. For her, it simply boils down to 'she's a girl'.
This is the mother of your child, I understand principle but I do find it weird how willing you are to throw a deep relationship w/ a kid for a friendship.
Quite honestly, I want to spend the rest of my life with her. She has flaws, but so does everyone. And outside of this issue alone, in my eyes she is perfect. I absolutely adore her, and my child. But this issue has been a thorn for the entire 4 years, and I'm tired of it.
I've screwed up by lying. That's on me and I'll have to deal with the consequences of that. Having a friend, whether they're male or female, isn't wrong though and I shouldn't be demonized for it. And cutting her off isn't the right thing to do even if it does cost the relationship.
Ask for a test immediately
But are there issues? OP has already met her family on several occasions and he continuously makes note of how close she is with her family. The only problem the gf has is with the brother’s fiancée but she cares about the gf enough that she went out of her way to text OP’s gf personally to make sure the date they choose would work for them to come. Gf’s reaction are just so strange to me and make no sense with the information presented.
She did this for her own safety.
Wow. You guys are a mess. You should be around her kid. You’re not in love. And you clearly can’t be faithful.
Mess
I mean even if I can just get him on the phone I feel like he’s eventually explain to me what happened. This was just very out of character and not him
Ex’s are a great source for affair partners. Just saying.
You think so? I just can't leave him like that. That's not a reason to leave your gf yk. We can grow together in a good relationship…
That's wild. I would never do this to a SO. That's a type of blow to confidence that will randomly pop up in the back of your head forever. Pretty inconsiderate imo. It'd be different if you purchased it. People these days are just … Sigh
Op you deserve someone to be considerate of your feelings and who appreciates and craves your body for you. Don't feel like you are less because she was being selfish in this matter. And I hope you can resolve it and put the newly crafted insecurity away eventually.