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Definitely her. Just like a how a person who sleeps with married people is a terrible human, but the cheater is always to culpable one.
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My wife works from home. I do not. What happened was, yesterday, I got home later than usual. I walk in and my wife is sitting there with one of her good friends.
At that moment, I was tired, hungry, and had a splitting headache, so, I wasn't Mr. Walmart Greeter Cheerful Man when I walked in. I started taking off my coat, and putting my stuff down. When there wasn't an immediate ” Hello, Hi Honey”, my wife goes, ” Look, we have company.”
I was still trying to just get my stuff organized, and threw out a ” what's up”, no, I didn't look at her when I said it. She said, ” not much”.
I said, ” Ok, cool, I'm going to lie down for a bit” and went into our bedroom( we live in a 1 bedroom apt. btw)
Within about 25 seconds of me getting into the room & onto the bed, I hear my wife go, ” hold on, I'm going to talk to him”.
She comes in, closes the door and starts angrily whispering about how she can't believe I was so rude to her friend, our guest. I said I didn't think I was rude at all. My wife said she thought I was rude and says it makes her look bad to have a ” husband with no manners”.
My case was A) I didn't know we were having people over B) I'm tired as hell and half a horrible headache and C) this is not something to be livid over.
I told her I didn't really have anything else to say and asked her to let me know when she was prepping dinner so I could help her. She rolled her eyes and commented that I shouldn't get dinner after putting her through this.
She left, went back to her friend, and apologized for my ” rudeness”. I rested, her friend left. We ate dinner in silence.
She's still angry about it.
How can I get her to move past this?
TLDR: My wife is angry I wasn't more cheerful around her friend.
You’re right. I shouldn’t jump to any conclusions. I just gotta accept that she changed and I didn’t I guess
What are you doing to better yourself? Do you have a therapist or the like that is helping to heal and deal with your past? It's unfair to unload your past relationship trauma (and the like) onto a current / soon to be partner and expect them to just deal with it.
Just curious in general: how is someone expected to experience fun and social interaction when their bf/gf lives in another country? Does the promise of a future life together sustain them through the drought of living life live!?
He doesn't want to feel pressured into marriage. You don't want to feel pressured into paying for a reno on a house that doesn't belong to you. Seems simple enough to me.
Best you end this relationship. Wouldn’t want you procreating and bringing down the average, 100 IQ is low enough…