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You go down on him for an hour?! What?! That doesn’t sound right. Frankly he sounds like a huge jerk and you deserve someone who appreciates you.
I trusted my wife. That's why she went on the trips. Someone is always trustworthy until they aren't.
Wow, ghost him as an advice getting upvoted…damn this community has sunk low
Ok but the problem isn’t her having the ick.
You’re not a priority to him. It’s okay if he misses your birthday for work or other urgent stuff life happens. What is important is that he proactively makes it up to you with meaningful gestures to show that you are important. “Hey hun I’m so sorry I have to miss your bday because of _________ there is no way to avoid it. Im bummed but I want to make it up to you let’s do __________ on ____________. “ Those fill in the blanks should be something specific to you things you love. He should know those.
Despite the problem being caused by him, you found a solution that you're perfectly happy with. If he's not happy with this solution, it's on him to figure out another one that will work for both him and you. The solution he's proposing only works for him, which is selfish.