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Saved this because even tho I’m not at all involved in the arts, I think this applies to most professional careers, and I have a feeling I’ll need to read this after I inevitably hit a bump in the road again. Thanks for this!
I’m sorry but it’s best to break up.
Yes it sucks right now but if you don’t this will kill your self confidence for the duration of your relationship and wouldn’t allow you to heal from this betrayal.
I don't think there's a bad guy here.
You realized the relationship wasn't working (for more reasons than just the distance), so you broke it off. That was the right thing to do.
She may have realized she liked the city after spending time there during your relationship, so she moved there. You became distant in the last leg of your relationship, so it makes sense she didn't reach out since I'm sure she figured that you wouldn't be interested after getting distant and dumping her. That was also the right thing to do.
I know the mistakes I made in the past and I hope she is able to recognize she isnt perfect either
This mindset feels a little vindictive. Nobody is perfect, but in your situation nobody is a villain either. Maybe she let you plan more because she was traveling to you almost all of the time so it felt like a fair tradeoff. Maybe she thought you liked being the planner if you never discussed your resentment. Her telling you about her life isn't rubbing it in, you asked. I think you're letting your hurt color this in a more negative light than any of it is intended.
It's okay to be hurt. It's okay to feel sad and wish things had gone differently. Ultimately, the relationship didn't have legs and that can happen. Right person wrong time is still the wrong person. Keep yourself busy and focus on moving on.
She sounds really immature and like she expects every moment to be about her and about what she wants, and that's not how life works. Sorry she did that, I'd have been annoyed and gone to sleep in the living room too. She definitely doesn't respect you or what you have to say dude. sorry.