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? Friday (21.04.23) – morning, start 6:00-7:00, 20 y.o.
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The cheating and lying is bad. I'm sorry this happened. She was obvioulsy a different person at 18 than she is now but you're the only one here who honestly knows what she's like. What made you feel like digging through her diary? Is her behavior suspicious or did curiosity kill the cat here? What led to her admitting this stuff?
Aside from that, the dreaming/fantasizing/infatuation stuff sounds like she's craving intimacy, romance or maybe adventure. Do you guys still date often? Do you make sure to still keep things romantic or do you think she just feels like a housewife/mom? Do you guys make a point to do new things as a couple?
Have you endured worse abuse than this?
There's a reason you've stayed with someone who treats you this way, a good therapist can help you get to the root.
You deserve a soft life full of love and a partner who contributes meaningfully to that. You are worthy.
You should not be proud of being known for being harsh. Who does that benefit? Why do you want to rile people up as a joke? Is it because you would rather give them a reason to be mad than to have them explode about something unexpected? It sounds like a defense mechanism that no longer serves you. It might have kept you safe when you were younger but it's damaging your relationships now.
Be kind. Especially to yourself. The world is naked enough as it is.
She’s broken trust. The only things that can fix it are honesty, openness, and lots of time. While you’re waiting for that, don’t let her near your condoms with anything pointy. You can’t trust her.
Easy. Just talk to him and say, “Hey, I get it, we're all looking, but you're bordering on disrespectful with how much you're obviously checking out this specific girl”
OR
you can be petty and start very obviously eyeing up all the hotties (maybe your own specific hottie) and feel free to add in a giggle or two whenever.
And then watch him get uncomfortable and project onto you everything you just wrote hehe
Sorry I haven't explained myself well. She wanted comfort and she thanked me for it. We were laughing eating together and watching tv after so i did help. We have a tiny apartment and it's like a kitchen living room combination so we're always jn the same shared space. So I just wasn't thinking she wanted to do yoga I sometimes smoke when I play and it's never bothered her in the past so I never thought it would be an issue
He’s crazy controlling and the fact that you’re actually questioning this says that he’s already gotten into your head with his ridiculous behavior. End it now, it will only get worse.
I do, I just have this false hope that the fighting cycles will stop and we’ll end up having more good times than bad. Because we’ve had great times, but it would come with a caveat most of the times.
Why would you be shallow? You can break up with someone for any reason you want. The other option is to stick it out because I’m sure you’ll get us to being unhappy.