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1. Op, I’d wait at least 2 years to propose. You both need to talk more and get on the same page about everything plus grow up a bit more.

   Two years to save and pay down on debt. To start planning. Learn.

   Don’t go in debt over something so intangible.

   Get done marriage counseling or premarital. Y’all need to get on the same page about more than just the wedding.

   Marriage is not 50/50. It’s 100/100.

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2. Yeah, I'm sorry you had to go through that. It sounds like you were utterly manipulated there and I feel for you. Hopefully in the future you'll at least learn from this and forbid something similar happens again, you'll be able to stand up for yourself better.

   If there's not enough to go to the authorities with, stick to your guns and have zero contact. Sounds like you left it opened ended, so I might be more firm “do not contact me anymore” or something. Not having time to talk and the such leaves the door open for him. If he keeps insisting on contacting you against your wishes or shows up at your place uninvited then that's enough to go to the authorities I would think. Beyond that, your friend probably needs to know what kind of guy this is and why you can't be around him. She can make their own informed choice after that. But most definitely if he shows up to a group event or whatever, remove yourself immediately. Please take care of yourself most of all here.

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3. She is creative- I will give her that.

   2 hours is a long time to blab on and on and on though. Maybe that is the point.

   Though I have a feeling you will suck it up and go more underground with your cheating….

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4. I'm sorry for your situation now. I would wait until morning, and in the meantime stay on the couch. Wake him up early. You could even be nice and bring him coffee in bed before you lay the bombshell on him.

   So first, try to calm yourself. I know that's naked, but you want to be as clear as you can be for this conversation and not let it get into a screaming match. I understand that you are angry, but be calm. After all, you've made your decision, and there is no going back. You can start and end the conversation with “(Name) text last night and wants to know if you nutted in her. You can go tell her in person, and do not come back. Ever. We will arrange a time and date for you to pick up your things.” If he starts to argue, you tell him you are calling the police to have him evicted. Have the phone in your hand.

   And then you are done with him. But not with you emotions, obviously. I can only tell you you are better off to find out now then later on. And you can move on with your life because now you have space to heal and find someone better. And it will get better. Hugs.

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5. she still gets super turned on at the thought of being a married man's side piece.

   I don't think that's what was turning her on. I think it was remembering being the “little girl”/submissive that got her.

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6. I responded to “cuss him out”.

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