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I think if you have to ask internet strangers whether if it is too soon to propose, you're not ready to be married. You have to have your answers for all important questions: future kids, finances, where to live!, what to do with elderly parents, what if any of you will have a job opportunity abroad, how to save money, politics, religion, etc.
Marriage is not just a fancy wedding and happy life after, it needs a lot of teamwork. You have to be on the same page with your partner, meaning first you'd need to be 100% sure she will say yes if you propose. And be aware that these heightened feelings usually fade with time, but love and respect can stay if you work for those. Who will you two be when the honeymoon period ends? Get the answers first, ask the big question after.
If you buy a house while yall are married she will still get half in a divorce because it will be considered a marital asset so i woyld suggest renting until yall figure this out but still give her 5k for half of her original 10k investment
I had this happen to me – except it was worse. It was my husband. We were high school sweethearts, together for 14 years. When I found out it was obviously devastating. I mean, “devastating” is a fucking understatement.
The worst part is that after I found out, I never heard from his family again. The family that I was literally a part of – and he had a huge extended family that I knew well. No one reached out to me to comfort me, apologize, nothing. And I didn’t reach out to them either. What do you even say? Sorry your son is a pedophile??
It’s tough. There’s no good answer. I guess I don’t really have advice, but I empathize. I’m sorry you had to find this out about your friend. It can really shake up your whole world.
If he keeps asking tell him to respect your answer or move on if he’s that desperate for one
You're fucking right. I'm in the clouds. This is what I needed to hear.
Depends on whether or not you guys change them out at the same rate. If he uses his longer than you, or is using it more before washing it, then his could smell and not yours. Worth a test.
Sweet home Old Valyria ?‍??‍?
No. Not even close to being the greatest self-sabotage I've ever heard. And if you would've said no, he would've done it anyway, so don't beat yourself up too bad. The fact that he's also excited by the thought of his wife being with other men just tells me that the marriage is already on life-support. The only question is whether or not you both think it's worth saving and are willing to put in the work to save it…or if it's best to just pull the plug. I'm so sorry, but since you're not OK with it (I wouldn't be either), there's really no other options.
Your family is toxic, hers is not, why are you comparing them as if they're the same?
You weren't there for your wife in one of the most difficult times in her life, you've never confronted your parents about their behaviour, I'm amazed your wife hasn't divorced you.
As to what you should do, I'd start with talking to your parents, not just about the stuff that your wife had to provide you video evidence for, but for everything that she's talked to you about.
By refusing to take your wife's side and expecting her to just forget it and let your parents back into her and her children's lives, you've taken their side.
Easy. “Hey -girlfriend's name-, I've been thinking about my birthday/this religious holiday coming up and I would really like this specific present or something similar. I would be so happy/grateful/positive emotion if you could get it for me”
Basically, if you don't like what she's giving, be specific about something you do want her to give you. You can even be specific yet vague enough that she's got room to look around for something that fits in her budget.
I gift people handmade Crochet stuff all the time but it's mostly because they aren't forthcoming about what they want. I also used to get gifted lots of tat at Christmas until I politely told my family that I didn't need gifts any more or if there was something they would get me collectively, I'd let them know.
But yeah. Be upfront.
I've said this to my partner.. I can no longer promise to call the woman a shortened name as it's a life long behaviour and it will not be unlearned easily, I will fall down. I will try not to use that name, but I can't promise.