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Yeah I grew up in a Christian private school and the idea of spending significant amounts of time with any more Christians is not something that excites me.
8==D ({*})
Because you described it that way even though you’re supposedly a grown adult who should know that previous relationships are a fraught topic for many, not casual?
he seems to be pushing things in the future because he doesnt want to deal with them now (not a good sign) then when you have suggested solutions he shoots them down. he might not want or be ready for this and is leading you on. planning your wedding shouldnt be this dramatic and stressful, it should be a happy time and it seems he switched up a little bit
Repressed memories are a phenomenon backed by neuroscience. Van der Kolk's book is a very good resource on trauma disorders. As not everyone has time to read or money to spend, I would suggest listening to some of his talks on YouTube if you're interested in the topic of trauma and it's influence on development, the brain, and coping methods. Van der Kolk is one of the leading scientists in this field.
However, as I laid out in my other comment: The point here is that there is no trauma in OP's wife, just guilt. So the likelihood of passive suppression of the memory by the brain is low. It is more likely that OP's wife deluded herself by repressing the memory actively/cognitively.
My response to him saying he wants to leave over something I did that he won't explain to me would be “ok, bye then” .
Dude is manipulative, you said it yourself. He's playing mind games with you again. For the sake of your own self-esteem and mental health, don't stick around and take it.
Write off the reason that he wanted to leave as “he's a manipulative piece of shit who isn't worth my time” .
Is this readable on mobile for y'all? Cuz the “code” formatting is a mess on desktop.