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Yeah that’s why I just don’t know what to do I just feel horrible. It’s affecting me all the time and her name was Trinity so I see her name in public all the time cause of churches and other shit around me lol. It’s just really naked I don’t have any friends anymore either cause my childhood best friend moved in 11th grade so I’ve been really lonely after losing both of them and I’ve gone through like everything between me and her in my head a million times always feeling like I messed everything up. Idk exactly what abandonment issues are like I could guess from the name but what it did give me is extreme anxiety when trying to talk to anyone in general more specifically girls I used to be shy in the first place but now it’s so nude to even say anything back when one talks to me trying to chat like friends cause I just get terrified never used to happen until after she rejected me and stopped acting the same way it was really traumatizing for like 15 year old me
Wait, you’ve had a boyfriend for 32 years?!?
I never said anything about expecting. You added that. I think it's reasonable to want an explanation. You aren't giving her one. If you don't want people to draw the wrong conclusions then give them the right ones. Your hurt pride over being used by your ex is getting in the way of you being honest.
I’ve never had a post blow up like this so staying on top of everything is challenging. The toxicity in some of these comments is unreal. She moved away because she wanted to pursue her dreams in CA. I supported her in doing so. I planned this trip and she supported me in doing so. Not sure where the abandonment comes into play
I would talk about love languages and ask what his are. You clearly seem to enjoy gift giving and getting gifts as a sign of love, and he probably just isn't the same way. I think that's a good way to start the conversation and then you can mention during the conversation how it makes you feel when you received gifts that don't seem to have thought behind them and why it's important to you that you; ex. that it's important that you feel like he listens to you, the gifting is a sign of love to you, and why you would appreciate it, etc.
You mean the person that he talked about sports with in your last post?
So.
limerance is usually a mental illness, or a symptom of one.
From what you've written, it's unlikely that he'll get any mental health help – and honestly, even if he does – you've already checked out.
See a lawyer, get the divorce, and be happy.
He does listen to me, 99% of the time. Which is why this impacted me so much. We’ve been together for 6 months and he has always respected my boundaries.
Honestly best response…
Don't.
If you think she's interested and you're not, don't do anything that could give her hope, it's not fair.
Also, you've never had a relationship, why you trying to be a player?
She texts me I miss you and I respond wit lmao then she leaves me on open. I want to respond back
You laughed at her saying “I miss you”
There's nothing to “respond back” to here lmao, she left you on open/read. You'd just be following up your lmao.
Do you really want to be friends or do you just want to be friends in case she wants more in the future?
A few options:
He is selective about who he introduces to his family / this means he takes his time He doesn't think his family will accept you for some reason Similar to above, but he is for some reason nervous about introducing you, whether that's internalized, or legitimate He has another girlfriend that they DO know about
Can you rule out any of the above? Do any of the above stand out to you?
It's been 2 months, so it's a bit soon to force the issue, so maybe give him another month before asking something like “When will you be telling my family about me?”
If he is wishy-washy about it again, ask him to be more specific as to why.
“Desperate” is a pretty melodramatic word. Real estate investment should never involve strong emotions like that. You'll be setting yourself up for trouble, either financial or with your relationship, likely both.