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You need to tell her family you can’t do it anymore & be firm. This is their job to get her stuff in order, not yours
If you really want to get into a tit for tat situation, the equivalent would be him not giving her child from a previous marriage any money when OP gets his inheritance.
You want advice other than dump him but there is no magic words the internet can give you when you’ve tried for 4 years. He has the situation he wants. You do everything for him. He basically has a maid who sleeps with him all for free. He doesn’t care about your mental well being. The only advice I could possibly give is stop. Stop cooking for him. Only cook enough for yourself. Stop doing his dishes. Keep one set clean for yourself. Stop doing his laundry. Stop begging like it’s your job and it’s a favor if he “helps”. Stop picking up after him. Your word’s obviously have no effect so it’s time for actions. Then say “when the house gets messy enough that I consider it unlivable I leave”.
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It’s predatory. Period.
He sounds like a whiny, needy lil weenie, and you should look elsewhere to get your own needs met, cause there's no way he's meeting your needs.
She cheated Slept with married man
The first one is a hot boundary for me. The second one is misalignment in values from my perspective. I would break up with a person over either of these being crossed, let alone both.
LOL
He could as well have told them you were a friend and they would have asked the same questions, because it's called chit chat
It might be too late but they might not even have the nudes I got an email like that and some info they had from me was true but what wasn’t true was the nudes because I have never taken any, so I never answered and nothing ever happened. Her info probably was leaked through a data breach from t-mobile or something like that and they use that to try to get people’s money with zero effort.
I told myself I wouldn’t ever be in this situation, but here I am. I am not good at holding my boundaries.