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Guys like this, remain like this. No matter how many special days come and go, he will continue to do nothing and your feelings will be hurt forever.
experience
I totally understand. My ex was kind of a recluse and my boyfriend now is very social. It's completely new waters to navigate.
I would lose nothing by marrying her, which is why the easy solution is so tempting.
I guess my main worry is splitting up because we came so close to it so many times and things get weird between us sometimes still. I don’t have a support network, all I really have is resilience and a house. Her support network is my support network. The house I bought (she has adhd and is not good with money so we have been keeping finances seperate) by sacrificing at an earlier age and saving up for. If I lost both that and my wife I don’t know If I’d survive.
All the more reason why she should not be allowed to give peopke advice on their mental health. Hopefully even without you reporting her, psych professors will see through her and intervene.
When she was young did you spend time with her? Do you try to spend time with her now? Was she invited to Disneyland? She’s part of your family. You don’t just have two kids (legally children, yes, but she’s still your child).
I can imagine it can be very hurtful for a child to see you be a completely different parent to her than you are to your younger kids. I can imagine that, because that’s how it was for me with my mom. Everything with me growing up was harsh, “no”, very rigid. With my sisters it was pretty positive, lots of “yes”, more relaxed.
I think you may need to take some time to reflect on that. It may be what has happened. Or,
I did the quick math, seems as though your daughter was an only child until she was an adult (or within a few months.) She was spoiled with all of your time and affection and now she’s jealous that she no longer gets that, because you’re giving it all to two little kids.
The last option is shes just very manipulative and ungrateful. No matter what, you need to really consider what’s going on with her. Maybe talk to her mother and see if you can get some insight. Talk to your daughter and ask her how she feels (outside of just the money.)
She's 25. That's old enough to understand her parents were teenagers and he's “prioritizing” his new children because they are CHILDREN and she is an ADULT. Embarrassing way for a 25 year old to act.
They have been dating 10 years, they are obviously committed to each other. They are adults. I’m sure they have discussed kids and their future plans in the last 10 years. There are lots of couples the same age that choose to be child free. You don’t badger them about their perceived “future regrets.”
This is 100% NOT you business.
Divorce, seperate finances and make sure you put a plan in to place to protect your assets for your daughter. Make sure money is put in an account he and his family cant access. Im sorry this has happened op.
i’m not sure but i feel like it’s his only vice
Maybe it does, but do you really wanna be with someone who wishes they were sleeping alone every night? That would kill me.
Well that’s good to know. I don’t know if everyone considers simply expressing feelings to someone as emotional cheating, especially if it’s followed by talking it out with one’s partner. As I mentioned in a previous comment, I THOUGHT I was doing the right thing by being transparent to all those involved. I always try to be very clear and honest about my feelings, and sure, maybe I misjudged but I feel it’s not fair to paint me as Satan without knowing my intentions. You don’t have to care about my feelings, but I care about the feelings of those involved and that’s why I am seeking advice. I’ve told them that I should probably spend time alone, and neither of them want that. And I don’t want to hurt them MORE in the process of not hurting them.
I’m happy you’ve never unintentionally hurt someone before but some of us fuck up, even majorly, and seek guidance.