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Seek therapy to stop fixating on your gfs purity or whatever creepy shit this is. You genuinely need professional help
Thanks for the response, her other points were:
Getting used to being in a relationship: -one of her couple friends being open with that in the relationship her dad being shitty and her male family members being praised for being players and that being the norm in her upbringing
Yes, 100 percent agree. Which is why I included the line stating that this was some really immature shit to say to a partner.
I hate to say it, but this is why being monogamous in college is overrated. You’re still exploring who you are and where your boundaries lie. Sounds like at most, a kiss happened when she was blackout drunk.
When I first started seeing my eventual husband, I had only recently ended a string of monogamous relationships and I was only a few years out of college. We didn’t live! in the same city, and I remember vividly the first time I texted him something like that (“this person wants to kiss me”) and he responded, very enthusiastically, go for it! And tell me about it later. The trust! The empowerment! The empathy!
That was 13 years ago. I still wish I hadn’t had those previous relationships- they really kept me from the college experience I wish I had. Not necessarily meaning hookups – but the stress of not being trusted, even by myself, wore on me. Turns out I didn’t need to do any of that.
YMMV but if this is your only issue, I would try empathy first before you distrust.
Also, team big arms, lol