Sure (maybe) there are respectful BDSM relationships but I do not believe that they are the representative majority, I think they’re the figurehead minority that the majority of abusers and abusees hide behind.
And you base this on what, exactly? Do you have experience in the community? Do you know anyone in the community?
The explicit communication you are advising is the norm in BDSM, not the exception.
What this young woman is doing is worrying, not for the acts themselves (which can be carried out safely) but for her lack of boundaries. These activities need to be ringfenced by a whole lot of mutually-agreed-upon rules and gated behind a bunch of trust.
She seems to be receptive. I’d say go for it (politely, of course)and get a new doctor regardless of the answer.
Sure (maybe) there are respectful BDSM relationships but I do not believe that they are the representative majority, I think they’re the figurehead minority that the majority of abusers and abusees hide behind.
And you base this on what, exactly? Do you have experience in the community? Do you know anyone in the community?
The explicit communication you are advising is the norm in BDSM, not the exception.
What this young woman is doing is worrying, not for the acts themselves (which can be carried out safely) but for her lack of boundaries. These activities need to be ringfenced by a whole lot of mutually-agreed-upon rules and gated behind a bunch of trust.