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Model from: ru
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Birth Date: 1984-06-23
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Put her on blast (politely) in the family group chat (if you don’t already have one that’s your first problem, she has no accountability) and force her to host the next holiday or family event. That’s what my family does ??‍? and let me tell you people fall in line QUICK.
Good lines I’ve seen used include: – “we haven’t been over to the house in X years and would love to be able to celebrate your life together!” – “don’t even worry I’ll do all the planning and bring the food + you hosting would be more than enough as a gift” -another good one for assholes is family pictures. Guarantee she’d show up for that. -as others said I’d stop inviting her, on invitations be sure to only include husband+kids names -“I’d love for the daughters to bake some holiday cookies with the kids this year!” In family chat of course and continue to plan and force it there so others can see
I don’t think there’s really a timeline for how long it takes to process trauma, I think it’s a matter of how you process it, and if you let it take over and become your identity. As someone with a lot of past trauma, I sympathize with OP, but it’s not fair for her husband to have to drag her through life at the expense of his own life/happiness.
I wish it was fake! I don't want to psychoanalyze my family on here, but my guess as to why she's with him is the same as any woman in my family: He's nice and most likely won't kill me. I had a nude breakup with someone–not because they were a great boyfriend, but because I was worried that the next guy I dated could be abusive or a total creep.
In my sister's case, here comes a guy who doesn't look suspicious and seems more oblivious than malicious. He seems interested in her despite her having body image issues and mental health concerns. They exchange numbers and now she's got that honeymoon vision of their relationship, oblivious to his age, his lack of interests, his lack of intellect, and the fact that some of the family talk shit about him.
I was able to get through to her at one point. I'm known as the more outspoken one in my family. If I have a problem with you, it's gonna come up sooner or later. I spoke to her about EVERYONE'S issues with her bf and the next day she was considering breaking up with him. Unfortunately, I believe she doubled down.
“ He's kept it to himself because he thought it was more secure to only have one person know it”. I suspect control is the real reason. It is not normal that only one spouse is allowed to access common marital documents.
/r/nothingeverhappens
If your husband has been taking your drunk sister home regularly, it may not have been the first time your husband did this. Unless he was black out drunk, your husband has no excuse for what he did, and it's naked to think that your sister was able to consent if she was so drunk she couldn't remember it happening.
Your sister might be forgivable but she needs to go to Alcoholics Anonymous.
How attached are you to this mess because its only going to continue to be agony and disaster. Youre too young to need to be tied to these people and too old for the drama. You can find better.
So he just gave up on you because his dad said so? That just sounds like an easy excuse. Who else will he listen to in the future and discard you?
He is a total piece of shit. Leave him. Leave him now.
I'm not sure exactly. I was angry about the cheating and instantly kicked her out but it still hurts a lot about losing her too. All of this happened within the past 11 days. It's still really fresh on me right now and my emotions are kinda all over the place. I don't know if there is any chance of forgiveness from me for this. But i also don't want her to try anything like this moving forward.
Ugh, that's a tough one. Honestly, it seems a bit disrespectful to put you in that situation.