The ex fulfilled a need that OP WOULDN'T, not couldn't. She obviously could have found a way but chose not to and only retroactively would now that she knows it was his ex that helped out. If it was his mom or something she wouldn't have given a damn.
Ewwweeee so your husband, at his ripe ole age, was with a teenager at some point? That's all I got from that cuz baby girl has to be at least 4. Meaning mom had to be pregnant at 19…How long were they together???!
She says she doesn't love me the same anymore and doesn't want to be in a relationship with me.
And:
I keep wanting to fight hoping she's going to find the love she once had for me
Don't work out… Sorry.
Once there is a break in trust (unfaithfulness), that is typically a no coming back from. The relationship will never be the same.
This is true:
Everything and everyone tells me I should let her go.
But:
It pains me so much to think of that thought. She stuck by me during my darkest days. I don't want to give up on her.
You're phasing this as if you're the one giving up on her. When in reality, she gave up on you.
At this point, it would be accept and do what we can to give the child the heathiest upbringing without complicating things further.
So, I think for any chance of positive outcome, you shift your focus on the child. Trying to force the relationship when its not there, will do more harm than good. If things rekindle naturally down the road, great. But in the meantime, we throw in the towel and demonstrate that we're a good parent to our kid.
If she cannot do even the most basic proper hygiene, like brushing her teeth even slightly well… I can’t even imagine how she cares for the rest of herself.
Just hire someone to do the work that you and her don't want to do. No reason to fight or be resentful. You are tired and she forgets. Get someone to do it for you.
The ex fulfilled a need that OP WOULDN'T, not couldn't. She obviously could have found a way but chose not to and only retroactively would now that she knows it was his ex that helped out. If it was his mom or something she wouldn't have given a damn.
Sounds like you want to be single. His cheating was messaging a girl once that she looks fit?
Ewwweeee so your husband, at his ripe ole age, was with a teenager at some point? That's all I got from that cuz baby girl has to be at least 4. Meaning mom had to be pregnant at 19…How long were they together???!
I feel that. I grew the balls to break up tho. Therapie yay.
Never show up unannounced
And cooking for him!!
Go on Jerry Springer. STEVE! STEVE! STEVE!
This:
She says she doesn't love me the same anymore and doesn't want to be in a relationship with me.
And:
I keep wanting to fight hoping she's going to find the love she once had for me
Don't work out… Sorry.
Once there is a break in trust (unfaithfulness), that is typically a no coming back from. The relationship will never be the same.
This is true:
Everything and everyone tells me I should let her go.
But:
It pains me so much to think of that thought. She stuck by me during my darkest days. I don't want to give up on her.
You're phasing this as if you're the one giving up on her. When in reality, she gave up on you.
At this point, it would be accept and do what we can to give the child the heathiest upbringing without complicating things further.
So, I think for any chance of positive outcome, you shift your focus on the child. Trying to force the relationship when its not there, will do more harm than good. If things rekindle naturally down the road, great. But in the meantime, we throw in the towel and demonstrate that we're a good parent to our kid.
Immediately
Does she know its a hill you are willing to die on?
i’m pretty independent and solitary and someone who’s supposed to care about me not texting me for two days would not sit well with me at all
He’s gaslit you into believing your discomfort is unreasonable. It’s not at all. Your gut is right.
If she cannot do even the most basic proper hygiene, like brushing her teeth even slightly well… I can’t even imagine how she cares for the rest of herself.
Just hire someone to do the work that you and her don't want to do. No reason to fight or be resentful. You are tired and she forgets. Get someone to do it for you.