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He is a horrible person and his behaviour is unacceptable. He doesn't love you, he wants to change you and mold you into a doll. You are a toy to him. This isn't about health, it is about aesthetics. How do you get him to stop, you tell him that he is not to say or touch you in any way that is about your we8ght or how he wishes your body would be, for any reason. If he does, you walk.
You don't deserve this emotional abuse. You deserve more.
Also, as a side note. You don't need exercise to lose weight. Weight loss is almost entirely based on diet and calories. Yes, intensive exercise can help (which you don't seem capable of) but it is all about calorie intake vs calorie outgoing, not about time on a treadmill.
She is very loving towards me. And I know she regrets the cheating more than it hurts me honestly.
Yes, this is a red flag, but I’m trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. I’m sure my communication could have been better given our history as well.
Healthy conflict resolution is where each person’s feelings are treated as just as important, not more than, not less than, but just as important. So one side shares their perspective, receives validation, then the other side shares and gets the same. After that, solutions that work for both are explored and then implemented.
This is in contrast with what your partner does. What they do is guilt trip you. So google “7 Ways to Get Out of Guilt Trips.” It’s a great article that helps shut guilt trips down. So whatever you decide to do you might want to check that article out and maybe try it to help you better navigate communication with her because guilt trips are annoying as fuck.
My ex was told he’d never have kids. We had two. ?‍♀️
The thing is that it doesn't work that way. There is no “test” to prove if someone is capable of being abusive in a relationship, it's not like taking an STD test or a paternity test. The background check can come back clear, sure, but what does OP's gf expect from a therapist? Therapy will take months and doesn't work like that!
This. No God I’ve ever heard of or prayed to goes around sending rapists to ruin innocent women’s/couple’s lives with unwanted children. I understand your wife is looking to make some sense of this and using her religion to do so but I just don’t think that applies here. Of course it’s not for me or you or anyone else to tell a rape victim how to cope with their rape. As other have stated, please remember that while you have a duty to support your wife as best you can, you also have the right to live! your life on your own terms and choosing not accept responsibility for/love the child of your wife’s rapist DOES NOT make you a bad person, not does it mean you’re making this about you. My sincerest condolences and best wishes to you and your wife during the awful time, I genuinely hope you both come through this as close to healed and whole as possible, your wife especially of course.
Let them be friends? LoL
I have hooked up with my male BFF in the past, I was honest with it with my ex. He couldn't handle it even though I said, he and I have no desire to date or ever be more than friends. He couldn't handle it and it was eventually a reason we broke up. (Though mostly it was cause he fell in love with some married chick on the other side of the US).
My current bf also knows and he was like, ok. He didnt/doesn't care. They have a fine time when all of us hang out. He's never expressed any concern about my past. He knows where I want to be and who I want to be with.
His thoughts are like mine, who cares what you've done as long as you were safe and didn't catch anything you can spread around.
It does not happen every time, OP was quite clear that is not true. The only thing prone to causing the issue is her insisting
It's also not her dick. She doesn't have a right to an opinion about permanent surgical alteration of his body. He doesn't want it. End of. If she doesn't like that, she can walk.