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LMAO thanks SO MUCH for telling on yourself. now it’s obvious where all the vitriol is coming from, you’re trying to defend your own life choices. Your mom shouldn’t be used as your maid, chef, and personal shopper, you should be doing all that yourself. You identify with OPs boyfriend so you’re defending him with every ounce of your being to try and defend yourself. Thanks for the laugh, your admission really made my whole night. I’m saving this thread now ????
Not true. Abusers apologize all the time. Apologies are not indicative of accidents.
Yes, he has broken furniture, punched windows, thrown things around the house. Of course this is made worse if he has had any alcohol.
One time drove 100 mph on the highway, blew a ton of red lights, almost ran over people crossing the streets, ran stop signs, drove on bike lanes. He was lucky he didn’t crash, cause an injury and not one single cop saw him do this. He got away with it. I was in the vehicle I was terrified for my life.
He has threatened to kill me before. He takes my phone so I can’t call anyone for help. Has pushed me down while holding our daughter.
What trips me out is that his behavior changes when his kids are around, the ones he has visitations with. He acts like an Angel, is kind, calm, and sweet. But once they’re gone it’s like he returns to being this angry miserable person.
Question I would have if I was your friend: if it doesn't reflect your opinions, why do you think it's funny? If it doesn't reflect your opinions, why did you share it with other people, including people who are part of the target of the “joke”? A lot of people do silly things like this when they're younger. Growing out of it is possible and encouraged. But a HUGE part of that is being honest with yourself. Please keep reflecting on this. It'll do you (and those around you) good)
OP telling him at this point is not gonna make things better than knowing right away, in fact things might be worse now then they could’ve been then. What your mom said about messing up family dynamics is still in play; so if you need to clear your conscience be prepared to have to go stay somewhere else and to the humongous fights and name calling to come. If you’re lucky they won’t both blame you (one for telling and the other for keeping quiet) but be prepared for worse case scenario
Half only seems fair if her name goes in the mortgage but I’ve already paid about 20k off on it. And then what’s to stop her from just selling?
No shame in picking up street cast offs! It would make me happy to see someone use my stuff.
Was it drinks for her birthday, or also on her actual birthday?
I don't think the situation itself is automatically an issue. Partners often don't come to work socials. But the fact it's a big deal to you and she's not bothered is. You both need to talk about it properly.