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Call a lawyer first thing tomorrow. Get everything lined up. Then dump his cheating ass. Once she becomes his gf, she'll leave a vacancy for the position of mistress.
Why are either of you making the decision instead of putting some of that inheritance towards hiring a financial advisor? A one-off consultation wouldn’t be that expensive.
Putting the money into the kids’ 529 to me isn’t the worst idea but I do think it’s a worse idea than putting it into an investment or retirement fund. There are a ton of ways to pay for a child’s education, not really many to pay for retirement.
every man in the comments is ignoring the fact that you said this has been going on for multiple years. ed happens and it sucks but theres plenty you can do about it. its been going on for years and you havent done anything, now youre on here crying about how you doing nothing about it is preventing your girlfriend from being sexually satisfied in yalls relationship. if you want to keep her, do something about it. if not then break up with her. for most woman sex is important, but there are women for whom sex or even just piv sex is not important or a deal breaker.
Then he definitely needs to know. The sooner the better. He is already isolated somewhat and has no external support or ability to escape from the situation, if it happens to him. He needs to know he is at risk and what that means. You are working under the guise that it hasn’t happened, yet. He could be suffering already.
And good old uncle needs to be reported for breaking the guidelines of being a sex offender.
Sorry you’re going through this!
Men are fertile well into later life
To keep your life on track you could:
abort adopt out kinship fostering (a relative does the childcare until you're finished with school)
YOU IGNORE HER
Speaking as a father with a daughter, if I ever find out a step parent is going through my 19 year old daughters phone they are getting their fucking ass beaten.
I was in a long term relationship as a teenager too. I also dumped my BF after 6 years. Before that, I contemplated ending it for about a year. He was a great guy, but I realized I just wasn't ready to settle down. I was ready to date very quickly, because I did the emotional work of ending the relationship while I was still in it. That was very hot on my BF, who was blindsided, and also not fair, but I couldn't do it any differently at that time.
Maybe it was somewhat similar in your relationship?