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You are dating an alcoholic and you can't see that because this is a long distance relationship and you don't spend day-to-day together. I would dump him because I'd rather not date anyone who has addiction problems, because it never goes away and there are too many people out there to potentially date. There's nothing one person could have that could balance out being an addict. I'm sorry, I'm sure there are lovely people out there that have addictions, but I just can't.
Also, he disrespected you and your friends. I wouldn't forgive that. If you stay with him, you can end up with no friends, because people are not going to invite you anymore if you bring your alcoholic embarrassing awkward BF along.
You navigate this by breaking up with him. Don't take any apologies or “I'll get better” crap. Break up. Then apologize to your friends and tell them you broke up with him. Forget about it.
It's just unhealthy to have a relationship like this. To not be able to watch a movie without her getting upset is just ridiculous. I remember my husband once told me after having a little too much alcohol that he found Margo Robbie attractive, I just told him 'No shit Sherlock, she's stunnning, I'd be more concerned if you didnt”. She needs help with this, it's not ok.
>>he says I should be willing to give up stuff for a relationship and I agree, I
You shouldn't agree, though! That's a bonkers attitude. You may want the just leave her bro comments to be kept to a minimum, but perhaps that is because you don't want to face reality? You already spend a ton of time with her to the exclusion of other pursuits, including a gym habit that is good for you. Youknow how much my partner & I give up for our relationship? Nothing. He does what he wants and needs, I do what I want and need, and then we meet in the gaps. And are happy.
What else was he going to say to getting caught? This is up there with the usual bs excuses ‘my friends got me to download it cause they wanted to see what kind of ppl went on there these days..’ blah blah blah he has to make an excuse, he can’t go ‘yeh I’m edging my bets and looking for a side piece’
You are really putting men in a bad light if you believe men will cheat with one week without sex.