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u/whydoesmyhearthurt69, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.
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It doesn't look immediate, from OPs post they went from only talking every few weeks to every few months. There's no timeline for healing (and there's also the piece where by the time a woman leaves a relationship she's certain she's done with it.) So assuming 3-6 months, she took the time she needed to heal, but also likely started that process towards the end of the relationship.
He may very well love you a lot, but it doesn't change what the previous said.
Go get an IUD or implant NOW. Some sort of birth control he can’t fuck with. Don’t tell him beforehand, because he’ll fight you, just do it and solve the damn problem on your terms.
Honestly this is a perfectly valid reason to cut all of them out of your life. This is also extreme, but depending on how your sister parents it might also be worth mentioning to her husband or CPS.
My dad got full custody of my sister and I, back in the early 90’s. My mom got absolutely nothing from the divorce- no house, vehicle, support money. It can be done but you need a good lawyer and a will to fight for it.
I do not know, but if she is telling so many lies you can't know what else she has told other people. If you throw her out she can portray you as same abuser or rapist. You might thibk it's ridiculous, but her lies are already past that barrier. Maybe tryo to have some cadual convos in social media saved as screenshots somewhere to show you were a normal couple, just in case.
I would never allow an adult to live with me expense free. Everyone has to pay their fair share.
Friend. You've been together for nearly 7 years. That's more than enough time to arrive at a decision about whether or not this is a permanent situation.
I get that you'd theoretically be open to continuing on as an unmarried couple. That's fine, it's 2022, people do stuff like that all the time for one reason or another. However, she's refusing to discuss anything that even bears a passing resemblance to long-term plans with you and that's straight up unreasonable. You're middle-aged adults, not two teenagers having a star-crossed summer fling. If my long-term s/o implemented that rule I'd feel like she's got one foot out the door and is wasting my time.
I really think you need to be having a larger discussion about what kind of future, if any, she sees for this relationship.
No.
This would be pretty bad in most circumstances, but the fact that she wants you to stop taking these medications so she can turn you down enough to maintain the EXACT SAME AMOUNT OF SEX you’re having now is downright awful.
Also…it bothers me that you’re “used to taking care of yourself” a lot. I get there are pillow princesses, but that is so shitty. So, to recap:
She doesn’t give in your sex life.
Has a lower libido, and with the medications your libidos now match. This is resulting in the exact same amount of sex as prior to the meds.
She wants you to stop taking what can be life saving mental health medications so she can be asked to have sex even though she has a history of declining more often than not.
I’m not going to tell you what I think should happen here, but please take a step back and reevaluate this.
The father moved his side piece in a week later and expected the kids to be okay. That’s so disrespectful – as someone whose parent has done the same thing. Then the passive agressive “are you mature enough to talk with me now” things. That’s something my own father did/does regularly to myself and my other siblings. Only 5 out of 6 of us still have any sort of relationship with him for the exact same reasons. Respect begets respect, and his father has shown him 0.
She is 19 and you’re 24 dude. You sound like a creeper from the 305
Words are useless here. She is only looking out for her needs. Until you start looking out for yours, you’ll still be stuck in the same endless cycle.
I don’t know where some have the gall to speak for all of us, but I definitely would not think that way if OP ended things with this gf either. Some relationships out grow their life expectancy. This person is arguing from the sunk cost fallacy viewpoint.
Dude same, I joined crossfit and with the loss of appetite from the depression it actually helped me kick into shape quite a bit. Totally take some time and look at things as objectively as you can you know. Take things a little slow, don't jump into too many large commitments. things will sort out as time goes. It can take some time but you definitely come out a pretty strong will'd individual after.