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I would just describe her behaviour and say that you were confused by it and ask her how she feels about you
Go for it!
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You still haven't told your wife after everyone said that should be your first priority in your original post?
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My dogs sleep on a dog bed next to the bed. Doesn't mean I love them any less.
bro it’s surprising this guy managed to fail in this direction, read outfit and Valentine’s Day and thought he was being discomfortingly sexual about your outfit, not insecure about the potential of your outfit-
Nope, you're not wrong and he's rather inconsiderate if you ask me. How about a little self respect on his part and a lot or respect for you? That doesn't seem too much to ask between a husband and a wife. He doesn't shower, tell him to use a dirty sock. Seems fair.
You definitely need to figure out if it is the porn or the masturbation. If it is the porn then you need to figure out why she is so against it i.e. has she dated a porn addict before, or is it just an insecurity that you are looking at other women. If it is the masturbation…I have no answers because I think it is unreasonable. My husband and I regularly masturbate together and alone, it is part of a healthy sexual relationship (and we even watch porn together to help get in the mood).
You guys need to figure our where you align and diverge on these issues, work out what you are both happy to compromise on, or if this is ultimately a deal breaker for one or both of you.