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You have to talk about this. He’s delayed coming home and he’s lying about it. Don’t let him turn the conversation around to why you were checking bank statements. You smelled beer. He lied. You had every reason to check. Now you need to know why and if he was alone. I’m sober. This does not sound like alcoholism or problem drinking unless there’s something you aren’t saying. This is someone lying about why they aren’t coming straight home from work.
You need to listen to everyone in this thread. Also out this guy and the others for going along with it…..
I think something worth asking (please answer if you’re comfortable to do so), why did you reduce your hours? You said it made you happier. A better person. What was the trigger to make such a big change?
The reality is that if you change your hours, all these things that make you, what you believe to be, a better person will turn you back to who you were before and I feel like you didn’t really like that person. That you were unhappy. It seems there was a lack of sleep. Not time to work out or take care of yourself. No meaningful work that truly fulfills/stimulates in fields that you are interested in.
She fell in love with the person you are now, due to the changes you made to your lifestyle. Maybe having a conversation about the reasons that pushed you to make these changes would be a good way to start.
Compromising is an inherent part of a healthy relationship. Would you be compromising your well-being, your mental and physical help, by making these changes she is asking for? Whatever your answer is, I think having an open conversation should be your first step.
> Are you sure you really want to be with her?
Yeah, she's my best friend
> Is there something lacking in your sex life?
No not exactly, we have great sex and it feels really intimate
> Are you a frequent consumer of porn
Not really anymore. It started to feel empty so I cut that out of my life for the most part in the past year
I’ve also had to be emotionally supportive of her since her diagnoses.
Oh, FFS. You don't get extra brownie points for being “emotionally supportive”, that is part of the bare minimum requirement of being someone's partner.
Red flag! Abort mission!
Huh? Used sales are as is. We have no idea what that person did to the clutch in a few days. Maybe they don't know how to drive standard and ruined the clutch? You can ruin one in ten minutes. Three days with the car is a long time
Date someone your age and you probably won’t have to worry about this.