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Sounds like what you think it is. Give him a chance to tell you but have your facts to hit him with. If he needed to sleep after the party and wanted to go to a hotel because he was so inebriated it would have been more than 5 hours of sleeping and he would have messaged you.
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This is what happens when you date someone that’s a decent amount younger than you at this age. You’re in different parts of life. You’re established and almost 30. She’s barely old enough to drink (if you’re in the US) and is about to graduate and be in the real world for the first time.
You have a way to prove he’s being gullible and tricked into being very insecure. Take the god damn test. Shit if my wife was spiralling into a pit of irrational insecurity and I have a way to definitively help stop it, I’d do it.
Say this to yourself “I’m going to save my marriage and prove I’m innocent, if that isn’t enough for him then I’m leaving.”
You then say that to him “I’m going to take this test, prove you are the father then when that proves I’m innocent, you are going to say sorry to me and we’re marching down to couples therapy as I’m not losing this relationship over bullshit or my past that I have nothing be ashamed of. What do it say to that?”
Don't make a baby with this douche.
That age gap is definitely weird. I’m a 46 year old woman and the youngest I would be willing to date let alone marry is 30 and that would have to be someone special.
I feel sorry for your son because I can’t imagine banging one of my daughters guy friends. 7.8 billion people on this planet and you choose to hook up with your sons best friend who was probably still in high school or just graduated. Ick
Also you totally ignored your son and lied to his face to go bang his bf. This age gap is disgusting and if you were a man banging a 18 year old girl you would get roasted.
Divorce has huge financial, social and emotional ramifications for your life. It's not a decision that should be hastily made. Even if it's the right decision, which it seems to be in this case, it's still an extremely difficult decision that requires deliberation and one should be sure to have exhausted the other reasonable options.
He doesn't want to try, he's already done.
Yeah that changes things I'm afraid. You said you wouldn't and then couldn't stick to it, and tried to hide it… and it's her place? Yeah, on you I think. But also relationship sounds turmoil with hiding exes anyway so like, I'd want out if I was withe either partner here. Find someone more compatible. But also stick to you word next time. You might think it's a small thing but it's a break in trust, which is fundamental to the relationship. So you really break that down and if you both can't trust the small things, you can't trust them to do the big things right either. And you both seem to think lying and hiding things is OK.
Does this regularly happen?
If not, I don’t really see why it’s a big deal. He didn’t want to go all the way at that moment. Why is it not okay for him to not want that but it’s okay for you to not want something?
It's cheating and he's for the streets. It'll never stop.