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I mean, she’s an adult and ultimately has to be the one to decide to leave. You can express your feelings to her of how she deserves better but at the end of the day, it’s her choice.
I asked her if wants to be with someone else someone who can give her what she wants; she said she wants to be with me; she just wants more from me. I see your point though
84 days sober here and I suggest getting yourself into some therapy to work through everything that you're struggling with. Professional help saved my life. I've relapsed three times in nearly 3 years – which is proud of. You need to take that responsibility in your recovery. Nobody else can make you drink.
Maybe it's just my insecurities speaking
It is. If it were undercracks or summat I'd get why you would be upset. It's not though.
Dude… you suck. Too much of a coward to own that the true MVP of this story was decent enough to let you go, you had to drag her down and besmirch her name?
I had a friend-of-a-friend who was a major alcoholic. So was his dad, who fortunately went sober after decades of trying.
Said acquaintance could drink more alcohol in one sitting than I could in a week. His tolerance was insane. And he had built it up over the years. He used to feel shame at some point, or so I was told. When we met, he was so far gone that he would answer the door in the morning with a rocks glass full of bourbon. And he would just drink all day long.
I don't share this to scare you, but to illustrate how bad alcoholism can be. It can destroy a person, because as they build tolerance and become more dependent, they drink more and lose their shame. You need to take this very seriously right now. I guarantee you that he knows how bad this is deep down inside, he just needs a push in the right direction. AlAnon is the thing to do.
Check out narcissistic personality traits. Because if that's what it is, run and run faaaast
As others have said, unless you saw the test results he could have just lied to you so he could get laid.
Even if you saw the test results it is entirely possible that he contracted the STI too recently for it to show up on his test results(not sure what the incubation time on that one is but some can take 3 months to show on a test). But that would mean he was with someone without telling.
You decide what to do with this info.
Honest don't bring it up. He feels insecure in your relationship. You coming in again saying you're unhappy that he followed your instructions will create a much more deep feeling of insecurity.
Try to find ways to show him “security” and confidence. It's rough but that's the path it's taken.
Also don't let these comments make you feel bad. What you asked for is not unreasonable or cruel. Your husband is just reacting normally to a normal relationship issue but the other issue was that it would end so you gotta do what you gotta do.
You asked her to shower with you so you could demonstrate how to brush her teeth properly.
LOL
I think the lesson here is don’t invite strangers on vacation with you.