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Wow! Such levels of trust in a relationship heading for marriage
I guess I should jab added we are in the middle of a breakup because I caught him messaging other people on dating websites the other day. He insists there’s nothing. So thinking about that and this person it’s like what are the chances he’s not talking to them to?
Speak with a lawyer first and proceed with the divorce. Your wife sounds delusional and only thinks about herself instead of her family’s finances & your daughter.
Let her go online with her parents. Your daughter is your top priority, not your wife’s “happiness”. Your daughter is still young but if you stay with that woman she’ll grow up to have an unhealthy idea of what a marriage/relationship should be/look like.
you don't want to throw the relationship away yet she already did by cheating. lots of red flags. text messages, access to the flat. forget emotional cheating. it's clear that they were cheating physically. this has turned toxic and you need to walk away as hot as it sounds. you need time to heal and move forward with your life. my longtime gf blamed me for her cheating too. don't fall for that tactic. She doesn't want to own up or take responsibility for her actions.
I don’t see why anyone couldn’t be into me. I’m fucking amazing
I feel you! I was quite similar not too long ago, and it was really naked to distinguish between “baby fever” and actually wanting to raise a human. It takes a while to figure out but I'm sure you can get there, with your husband for support
Yep because next phase will be him hitting her when she says no.
This was a test to see when he can escalate the abuse.
Yea like don’t shit where you eat. I’m glad they have been rejected because it could get messy quick.
Your Mum is right. Don’t waste your 20’s on a broke much older man imo.
Remember that getting drunk is never an excuse for cheating. Nor is it a mistake. She made a decision to get drunk and cheat. She also didn't come clean and tell you and that is telling. You're right this is not your fault and she must own it and be remoreseful. If you want to stay with her I would encourage couples and individual counseling. A therapist will have options on how to move forward.
Honestly it usually stinks to be in a room full of sweaty equipment and she told you about it so even if it makes you a little uncomfortable its not really a hill to die on.
Yeah for sure, I tried to use terms like “can be” and “not necessarily”, and disclaiming that I know a 22 year old isn't automatically like this to show that I'm not trying to speak for all 20-somethings.
I do however think it's a valid precaution for someone that's 30 year old to take, to just keep in mind that while it's possible to find a well-adjusted early twenty-something, you're also quite likely to find one that isn't. It's generally safer to just stay in your age bracket in terms of long-term dating when you're a few years removed from the college phase yourself.
Break up. Don't sacrifice your job prospects just because your BF doesn't want to move or do long distance.
He needs to learn to take a hint and respect people's boundaries. Tell him that this is between him and her and you're not going to ask her to respond to his messages. Then if he keeps on pushing, advise your GF to block him.
How does a 28 year old need to ask this question?
Started dating the “don't sorry about them” friend IMMEDIATELY after ending your relationship (he cheated on you, if not physically then definitely emotionally)
Started hitting you up again when she dumped him.
You were second choice to her, and now that she's got rid of him he's coming back to you.
And you're not only talking with him, but you're letting him try and remind you of the good stuff while completely ignoring how he actually treated you…
Has your spine been replaced by a wacky inflatable waving arms balloon man?
My advice is to ask someone IRL to slap you once very very hot, nobody on reddit can do that for you
Your husband doesn't know what a therapist is apparently. Oh boy…
“Don't stick your dick in a woman you didn't trust.”
Because I'd be telling idiots like OP's husband who didn't care or think about cheating or a DNA test until after having sex and well into pregnancy, with no sort of proof or real reason as to why they think that other than the fact that some women have done it before.
You have said nothing. Nothing, at all. What is it, you’re looking for?
From your description, I honestly think he’s just respectful to women.
He isn’t brash and he doesn’t want to do any of the gross things heterosexual macho men want to do. He’s moral, he’s good, he’s the golden standard and if he’s there, the guys who are assholes feel bad about themselves knowing he’s the good guy and he won’t do any of that shit.
It speaks more about how bad other men are, even those you probably also know and love. They fear how obviously their misogyny and their ignorance will shone through around him. They don’t want someone good raining on their shit parade.
Take it as compliment that those most vulnerable in your life feel safest around him.
u/LordZeppy hey kid it’s not a fucking reach its my boyfriend making fun of me about constantly and thinking it’s not a big deal when it literally is. Not even the sensitive snowflake type I’m just tired man
I don't blame him. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
Get sn annulment and cut your losses
I got less than two sentences into that mega paragraph and I already know you’re in a ridiculously toxic and abusive relationship.
Leave.
The problem is, everytime I bring this up, his dad and him don't react or don't take me seriously.
You write this? I see i made a mistake with the 4 years, but you literally wrote he does not take you seriously.
Nah, unless you’re doing work ups in port, and even then, they try not to keep you 15 hours a day. In any case that were true, they would make you stay on the ship during this time.
What she needs to do is talk to their ombudsman or frg or whatever service equivalent group there is to get some answers.
You good with being a mom to a 21 year old baby?
Cases like this is why people care about baggage.
Have you looked through their text convos? Facebook, IG, snapchat, or whatever other stuff he has on his phone? I would not warn him and just look through it all. “Snooping” is completely warranted in this case.
I’m not that much younger than you are. But at least you’ve got a lock on unearned condescension. You seem to be confusing being “grown up” with being an asshole.
Oh dear. ? Thanks scarlet.
OP, you know what you need to do.
So you're only 5 months in to the relationship, she asked for a break and basically stipulated that you remain faithful during this break, then she slept with someone else two days later? Mate, you should never put up with this sort of behaviour, but after only 5 months you should be livid that shes so brazen.
Let the other guy have her, she clearly likes him more than you.