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I think there’s a reason you’re here asking and I think it’s because you feel it’s a little over the line.
You see him in tender spaces where he is safe enough to sleep and sleepwalk and dream like a normal human. I think that you sense this would violate that bubble of sacredness that sort of belongs to you both, so I think you’re right to be cautious.
For me, I don’t bust my partner or kids doing stuff they’d feel embarrassed about. It’s naked enough being human outside in the world, so I don’t want to make it any harder when they’re actually just chilling at home you know?
I get it when y’all are awake and fuck things up then yes – laugh your balls off. But for the “human” moments – I keep those for myself. ?
You have to respect her decision for waiting on having sex and if that doesn’t set well with you then just be honest and upfront and tell her how you feel. It’s better for both of you to go your separate ways now rather than later after deep feelings have already started.
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Fortunately, she couldn't find anything wrong with me.
What a jerk you are. TOTAL JERK! /s
lol good job for you.
I'm in a powerless position, and it's entirely up to her. I plan on continuing to respect her space, but I can't help but feel so horrible.
Personally? I'd say “I'm in it to be in a relationship with you. Being 'friends' won't be enough for me. I love you and I want more. I KNOW you want more too and even if it scares you to be that way? That's what I want for us.”
For me? it'd be all or nothing. Riding the edge wouldn't be healthy for either of you in the long run. She'd get her “independence” while stringing you along hoping she'll “fix herself” but you already know she's going to hunker down and stay “independent”.
She's already admitted you're doing the right things even though she wants you to be the reason for the breakup. Keep doing those things and don't accept anything less than 100% because you aren't doing anything less than 100%.
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EXACTLY! Giving the ultimatum is wrong, but the fact OP hasn't already gone LC/NC shows what a crappy son he is. What a fucking betrayal, first by father, then by son.
Try to travel as often as you can to see one another. Get one of those credit cards that allow you to earn airline points and use it to purchase your every day things but PAY IT OFF EVERY SINGLE DAY so you don’t get into debt. But the airline points with accumulate helping you with the cost of flights. Whenever possible, fly with the same airline and sign up for their rewards programs. Those are some reality hacks to help.
But honestly it will all come down to communication and trust. Talk every day if possible. Meet each others friends. Trust each other.
My husband and I dated long distance for about a year and a half before we got engaged/married and I moved to the USA (from Canada) to join him. But we were quite a bit older (27&33) and wanting to settle down so I think that helped. The real truth is that you won’t be able to take this relationship to the next level without marriage because of immigration complications.
Grey rock! Stop giving your mom so much information about your life. YOUR life. Not hers.
The engagement is between you and your affianced. Not her. It does not involve her one little bit.
The eventual wedding is ALSO not about her. Your children, should you have them, are also not about her.
You need to flat out tell her that her involvement is minimal at best. You also need to tell her that failure to back off will result in a very decreased presence in your life. Good luck!!!
Ew. How do you respond?
It’s not a joke at all. You have wasted most of your youth on this sad sack and people don’t want you to waste the rest of it. I can tell you from personal experience that the minute you completely free yourself from this guy, you’ll feel a million times lighter. Stop doing this to yourself. He’s not worth it.
If one was pass out drunk and one was slightly drunk, only one person was raped here
Don’t care about the movies (although still kind of weird) definitely care about spending the night. I personally see that as a strong boundary
No bills, no laundry or cleaning, half cooking duties? Are you looking for a second wife?
By then she might have quit her job – don't procrastinate, just do it already. If you hadn't dithered for so long, you wouldn't be in this fix, because she'd know she can't quit.