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Why do you want a relationship with someone who is still in a relationship? It may very well be dead like he says but there's a reason why he hasn't left. You think he wouldn't do the same thing with you?
And it may not be dead like he says.. if I was, he should man the hell up and leave the girl.
This is also my first time dating again after about a 4 year break from my last relationship (23 almost 24M) (her, 19F)
His reasons are all incredibly selfish. He essentially said he wouldn’t need you because he wouldn’t want sex anymore anyway. His second reason is that he would blame you for the medical emergency that would be no fault of your own and not be able to control his temper. He sees you as an incubator, a source to produce HIS offspring, not a partner he wants to spend the rest of his life with. If you can’t produce a child you have no value to him.
Additionally, he’s not even listening to what you have to say about the hypothetical and taking your opinion into account. It would have been one thing for him to say save the child at first, hear you say you would want him to save your life, and reconsider his answer, but he can’t even do that.
Yes, 5 years is a long time to be together. But from 15-20 people grow and change, and sometimes diverge. And that’s ok, it doesn’t mean you are stuck with them forever. You still have a chance to get out and be with someone who sees you as a person, not a piece of meat and an incubator.
So your sister gets black out drunk and then your husband has sex with her? That’s rape. He was raping her. You cannot consent when you are intoxicated. Your husband is disgusting and you should not want to come back from that at all. Divorce him
Yeah right, because it's always the man's fault or the man not doing enough, right? Women are never at fault in relationships.
Coming from someone who did a LDR a long time ago, I understand how difficult it can be to stay connected. Sometimes those insecurities creep in for seemingly no reason, especially during times where maybe you aren’t talking as much, you’re both busy, etc.
This behavior is a deal breaker for some, but ultimately you need to determine if this is something you can move past after some good communication. If you do want to move past it, you need to figure out exactly where his insecurities or dreams are originating from – has he simply felt disconnected lately and his subconscious worries are becoming a burden, or is he the one doing some suspicious things and is deflecting blame? Both are possible.
What he did wasn’t right but sometimes these things go deeper than just a lack of trust when it comes to long distance relationships.