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Jasper, 33 y.o.
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Regret is not rape
Im sorry but normal men dont want to date influencers
You don't save this. You let it go. You don't have sex with her again and you split up officially and demand a 50/50 splint in rent and bills until you find someone to sub let to.
Dude don’t do that. I’m a US citizen and my first husband was from Europe. We got married fast so he could get his green card, I realized VERY shortly after that I didn’t love him and that I wanted a divorce. He convinced me to stay married to him and just live separately. Well that was a big ducking mistake, it caused so many problems for me. I still had to deal with immigration and lying to them about our false relationship could have resulted in prison time for me. Also because we were still legally connected I had to see him regularly. Also because your legally married she will be making decisions for you if you were to become incapacitated or injured. In my situation a year after separation (but still married) I became pregnant with my current partners baby. Being married was such a damn headache when your in a new relationship. She could also con you by using pics or messages of you with your new partner and claim infidelity and screw you over and get her green card through that. Separate everything especially your finances and make plans to move back to the US. If you need help there are many programs that will help you. Move to an inexpensive area to start and work any job you can. Once you save up you can move up in the world. But do not under any circumstances stay married, get a divorce and leave asap.
This may not be as severe of abuse as in your past, but it still counts as abuse. Adults are expected to handle their emotions in a way that doesn’t harm others, and he is unable to do that. He’s not worth any more of your time.
I wouldn’t get back with her there’s some lunch you don’t cross. And I will dump him. Also dump your friend and dump your ex girlfriend. Long distance relationships are really complicated. They don’t usually work. But I would still love them both alone. They knew they were involved with you. They knew this wasn’t a good thing to do and I did it anyway.
Did you clarify what being single will look like for both of you? These breaks and resets sound good in theory, but single means just that. Are you going to be okay with her possibly seeing other people and then maybe still wanting to be with you?
Be direct. Hinting, signaling, implying, and waiting is you not taking responsibility for your own happiness.
Better to be temporarily embarrassed than to potentially waste time hanging on to and hoping for something that may not even exist. Tell him. If you get rejected, now you know and can seek that connection elsewhere.
Hah, definitions aside, I live! in a rural town in the middle of the mountains. Not one single person here would describe it as a city. But that's not really the point of this post lol
lol “trust”, you know people lie?
so let me see if i got this right. He cheated on his ex with you and then moved in with you after he left her? ? you are indeed a resident side piece.
What does “almost out of the picture” mean? The reason you can’t let it go is this idea that your holding on to. Someone telling you that she likes you isn’t the start of a relationship. You say that you know it’s not cheating but a part of you seems to see it as such. My advice is to do whatever you need to do to stop bringing this up. She seems to be getting angry about the subject.
I stopped reading when you said he was abu…err testing you.
This man is bad for you.
omfg! when you marry her its automatic responsibility – you are responsible for the baby. That's why everyone here is wondering why you continue with the engagement when its auto broken when she gets pregnant by another man + when you don't want anything to do with the baby in every aspects of it but still want to marry her !!!???
what is wrong with you? with all your replies here you are totally unrealistic & illogical with the dynamics of having a family.
If you don't want to have ANYTHING to do with the baby that is NOT YOURS then don't marry her as YOU WILL have to do everything for the baby. You cannot just marry the mother & ignore the baby.
No. I believe that he has a nude time accepting responsibility. He almost never admits when he’s wrong.
And what did he say?
She’s doing this to herself. You’ve proof she’s trying to blackmail you. That’s a crime, you breaking up with her isn’t. Let her hurt herself. She’s just attention seeking.
In the end that's what it boils down to, the lack of the bigger picture.
It's assumed that everyone is equipped with the toolset to deal with these realities. People generally aren't. Let alone early 20 something. I'm likely projecting here to some extent, but it's real easy to ready 10 sentences and statements from someone and paint the girl in terrible light. We have no idea if she attempted support, or if the “I don't find you attractive” comment was malicious or just one of the thousand things that piled up and made her explode. EDs are terrifying and confusing and the stigma around men who suffer from it makes it even less easy to deal with.
These aren't married adults with life experience. It's a couple of kids finding their way. They probably shouldn't be dating unless they get support.
Yeah, some of the things that they've done were years ago, but as of late it's been burning me out. I keep feeling like a bad person because it's small stuff that I logically should be able to look past.