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4 thoughts on “Junohasan on-line webcams for YOU!”
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I get that the go to reason for it being an issue is jealousy, but it's not the only one, as your post suggest your eyes may have been opened sexually by the experience. I appreciate you clarifying the reasoning for doing it, but that doesn't necessarily mean it was a good move for the relationship.
We change as people and what we want/crave or need will evolve with experience, sometimes our partners can and will adapt (as we may for them) sometimes not.
Regardless this is just one potential point of discussion, it could have just been coincidence that it coincided with your loss of attraction, but as you say it may have been the turning point it's worth digging into.
Bottom line though, not all relationships persist, some run their course others don't. There's plenty of married couples still drooling over each other sexually 20, 30, 40 years later. Many don't and you either have to work to keep the spark alive (possibly with some couples therapy in there) and if that doesn't work out you may need to consider your options there.
It seems too soon to me, especially since you've only actually gone out with him in person for a few weeks out of the entire two months since you started talking. That would certainly not be enough time for me to get to know someone well enough to know that I wanted to commit to them, no matter how much texting we did in the meantime. If a dating partner asked me after only two months of intermittent contact to “define the relationship,” I think it would be startling! And it would make me wonder whether they truly cared about me as a person, or were just desperate to be in a relationship with SOMEONE. What's your rush?
As a female speaking, it isn't the act that you looked at porn or that she caught you. It is the idea that comes into our heads that we aren't good enough and will never be good enough to satisfy you and that's why you crept out of bed next to us to go rub one out. Even if that isn't what happened, that is how our mind processes it in the moment.
Like she said, we realize that this is irrational. We understand you have every right toward your own body and pleasuring yourself. However, we can not help when it feels like we just aren't good enough. You say 80% of the time, it feels like you will end up fooling around. Well, 90% of the time that we come “face to face” with our SO beating off without expecting it, it makes us feel ugly, prude, and unattractive. Again, we realize that is irrational. But we still need time to work through that in our own minds to finally understand it actually has nothing to do with us.
And yes, I know most guys will throw it back and say, “I would be so happy if I walked in on my girl doing that!” Or whatever. But, really, would you be that happy to walk in and see a huge dick on the screen that was significantly bigger than your own, and your girl is just going to town over it? You may say yes in theory. In the moment? You can't control your emotions when something shocks you.
In my experience 50/50 is the most they could hope for.