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Why try to force someone to marry you? If he doesn’t want to then leave and find someone that does.
I get that she wants out of her mom's house because she's toxic, but that doesn't not mean you are required to screw yourself over financially. She can move into your parents basement, or get an apartment with a friend.
You are not sexually compatible and will not be happy in a long term relationship. Sorry
Girl. If you’re feeling crazy bc of how he interacts with you- that’s by design on his part.
This will not get better. Get out!! You do NOT want a baby with this man.
Yikes
You need to end it before kids enter the picture. You two want different things. Religious/non-religious compatibility is very important in a relationship especially if one or both parties aren’t willing to compromise.
Honestly I think you should just take this as a learning opportunity and try to move past it. It's good that you're in therapy and in a better place but asking the girl you've kind of screwed over a few times now to trust you like that again is not the proper way forward.
If it helps it sounds like most of this is just the sort of dumb, shitty thing people do while growing up and not anything uniquely terrible. It sounds like you are maturing and if you actively try to be better in the future you could make a great partner… For the next person you have feelings for.
I know this isn't what you wanted to hear, but you seem to care about her a lot so just remember that this is what's best for her.