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Block him, find a therapist to get more stable and move on
Yes, when I mentioned gifts I meant was about flowers and cakes only.
Don’t let her move in.
Frankly, I think everyone should live! on their own and be responsible for bills, housecare, and the responsibilities financial and otherwise of running your own life before moving in with someone. I acknowledge the current economic situation makes that impossible for some.
‘However, your GF doesn’t seem to have a very good grasp of what being independent and managing all your life requirements means and you two have not been dating long. Frankly you two are still in the honeymoon stage of your relationship, figuring out if you could be compatible long term and want to be.
I think you need to be honest and upfront with her. Tell her you are not ready to move in together, and you are concerned that she is not willing to take on the financial and mental responsibilities of managing a household as a partner not a dependent. You both need time to really think about how you see the future working with the two of you and you need to talk to each other about if those futures and timelines are compatible. And before you move in together you need to discuss and come to mutual agreement on how to manage finances (bills, emergencies, how you will manage major purchases), household management (chores, repairs, etc), visitors and socialization, problem Resolution, communication all the unglamorous things that can’t guarantee a successful relationship, but lack of will guarantee relationship problems.
Sounds like in the past, when you liked someone you were hurt or betrayed in some unexpected way. So now that you like him, you fear the same thing happening. So to deal with that, you need to get better at telling if you can trust someone or not. When someone is trustworthy, they may hurt you or you may hurt them but it’s accidental and they work to fix it, they don’t betray or cheat and if things do end it’s because you talked about it and couldn’t solve it, it doesn’t hit you out of the blue unexpectedly. If working on telling if someone is trustworthy interests you, let me know and I’ll share more. As for playing nude ball, what do you do exactly?
I would say if you plan on having kids. Your future kids don't need this toxicity from the grandparents
At the time when he chose his first wife (OP's mom-16) it was not unusual or looked down on to date someone 3-4-5-8- years difference. It was flattering to have someone older interested in you.