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OP, I'm sorry you have to go through this. I grew up with an abusive mother and it took me years to realize how fucked up the whole situation was. Because as you also describe it yourself, she would be super nice, loving and normal a lot of the time, but suddenly flip out on me, berate me or use me as her “therapist”. That is 100% abusive and I only realized how bad it really was, once I was free from her and stopped all contact.
I can't imagine how hard it must be to be financially dependent, married and have kids with him but please, please leave. Could you move in with your parents or other family members? I know you can do it! Just know, you deserve better than this.
Can we address the age difference and how this might be a manipulative grooming tactic? This man knows its inappropriate to date you.
It's her body, I honestly don't see why you should have any say in the matter.
Do you ask her before you post pictures of yourself? Would you be comfortable letting her restrict what you can do on social media?
Sometimes people need to write it out and read it back to realise.
Did he tell you where he was until 3 in the morning? Did he go visit her to do damage control?
OP, you deserve better. Ending a long term relationship is not easy. But you have to protect yourself now. Contact a lawyer as soon as possible. If you are in the U.S. ALL his earnings are community property, even if he keeps it in his personal account. He can't just buy her a $1K gift, or spend tons of money on her. That's YOUR money too. He's using YOUR money to date her, impress her by taking her out every Saturday, buying her stuff, and probably giving her money.
An attorney will make sure that he stops spending YOUR money on her. Good luck.
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He is claiming he has given it up. It’s been months struggle to him finally giving it up, but I can say he has put in the work to stop it. My fear now is that his sex drive has tanked because he doesn’t have fresh mental images to stimulate him.
I am so sorry for everyone in this subreddit. This is the first time I posted here and I am scared, terrified, precocious for future reference. I just want you all to know who are suffering there are people out there who love you all even if they havent even met you yet. I posted on this subreddit without even reading the subreddit…life sucks alot…I am sorry everyone. I want to just say that life wasnt created easy for any of us. Life was created to help one another. I just read some of the saddest sitiautions I have ever seen. This is a prime example of people coming to gether as one to beat the odds and continue to move on from what we lost and build. I respect all who have suffered in the subreddit. I am sorry for my wimmpy post.
i thought my bf did. does your bf watch a lot of porn or masturbate a lot? that’s a big one. antidepressants? meds? ask if he masturbates before he sees u. me and my bf haven’t been together for 2 years, just a couple months, but sexually active for a few. he used to have a really bad masturbation/porn problem a while ago & it made it rlly hot for him to finish & stay hot at times for the first 2 months and it started to annoy me a bit because i felt like i wasn’t good enough or something. we’d have sex but it normally ended in him going soft or not being able to finish. he could go without a condom forever.
he cut out porn, when he masturbates now it’s to pics/vids of me or us together. now he’s capable of quickies, he NEEDS a condom now or he won’t last at all, i can finish him off multiple times, he said no other girl has been able to make him do that…probably because of the issue before. there’s still times where he can go soft but at least i know the issue isn’t me now, and normally i can get him back up again or we take a break.
Nope. Don’t do this. Don’t open that door. Don’t disrespect your husband. Tell him no thank you, he’s a part of your past, and then block him.
When you break up with him, give him no explanation. When he asks why, tell him “he’s a smart boy, he’ll figure it out” then walk away and never turn back.
I didn't mean that op didn't say no…but he was thinking to just have sex because of her constant advances… OP doesn't even have to think like that is what i meant