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Model from: fr
Languages: fr,es,en
Birth Date: 1994-10-28
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Stop buying him things. He doesn’t receive it with the same energy you are putting in.
Straight up, you seem like you have your shit together pretty well for being 20. Your boyfriend on the other hand is a train wreck looking for places to happen.
He borrowed your car to go joyriding in the snow, then did committed a hit-and-run with your car that wrecked your car. And now he can’t afford to pay for it. And while you say he’s a relatively good driver, he’s got a court date coming up where he’s going to lose his license. Girl, he is not even an ok driver.
And now he’s blaming minor cosmetic problems on why it broke when HE CRASHED IT? And he feels entitled to use YOUR SAVINGS to help him pay off his debt?
Definitely dump him. But, dump him because he’s a user. That is, he’ll just keep using you for his own benefit until you get tired or fed up. As soon as you start saying no, he’ll move on to his next target.
I’ve known guys like him my whole life, and there’s nothing but wreckage in their trail.
There’s no other way than just reaching out to her. Message her and say, “Hey, I know the last time we talked I wasn’t nice to you. In fact I was pretty mean to you. I think about that today and just wanted to offer an apology.”
That’s it; that’s all it needs to be. If she accepts and wants to engage with you, she’ll let you know.
So far so good
Girl, you need to leave. Don’t let others abuse you.
Yeah ok
It’s completely reasonable that she wouldn’t want to stay married to you if you transition. She married, or at least thought she married, a man. Whether she’s not attracted to women or if she just doesn’t think she wants to be in a relationship with you post transition I don’t blame her at all for telling you the truth. I don’t know very many people who would stay married if their SO came out as trans after years together. You had to know that she would feel off about this.
Plus it’s pretty fucked up that after telling her you’re trans and starting to transition you offered to martyr yourself and not actually transition because of her…very manipulative.
Just divorce. She doesn’t want to be with you through/after transitioning and you should live! your truth. You both deserve to be with someone who loves every part of you, and this ain’t it.
You absolutely should share the costs of your living arrangement. Doesnt have to be 50:50, but talk to him and try to come up with a number you both are comfortable with.
Report him. Go into the police – show them the evidence in person and explain to them that you did not ask for any pictures
I feel like a part of the issue is his mental illness. he's brought up before with both me and his therapist that he has trauma and cannot be alone, and so he seeks constant companionship with friends
What work is he doing to learn to entertain and soothe and support himself? He is 21 years old, there are many times now and in the future where he will be “alone” and he will need to learn to cope.
I don't want to interfere or worsen his mental illness but it also makes me extremely anxious when he meets a new girl friend live! for the sake on not wanting to be alone or to make new friends, espcially considering the way he interacts with a lot of them. I've asked before if he could limit interactions to be more appropriate (I.e no hanging out alone in private areas or not making friends unless u know the person irl) but he always forgets and states its due to mental illness.
Does it seem reasonable that he “forgets” this so frequently? (Not to me it doesn't. These are choices he is making.)
You can't trust him. Don't date someone you can't trust.