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I apologize for this if it’s stupid but wouldn’t it still show up on her regular checks even if it was dormant? That’s the only reason I can imagine that not being taken into account because op said they get regular checks.
How exactly do you think he crossed a boundary? I personally think not being with a member of the opposite sex alone an incredibly dumb and toxic boundary, but it’s something the two of you agreed to.
However, note that he did not hang out with her alone. So he didn’t break the boundary. It sounds like he was going to ask her to introduce him to people, which by definition would not be them hanging out alone.
She sounds like the type that would make problems then turn them around on you I'd tell her to leave me alone and stop trying to use me as a way to make you feel better… there problem solved
There are many things I regret in life, having an abortion is not one of them. I, too, was 19. Almost 35 now. It’s been 16 years and I can still say it was probably one of the most reasonable decisions I have ever made
And here's why he can keep behaving like a lamprey: He knows nothing is at a stake.
He can do whatever he wants, and you have no other choice than enabling him.
The person he was is dead, you can't bring him back from there. It will only get worse, but don't worry, you'll be spiraling down just next to him, like you want.
You are not here looking for good advice, you are here looking for a reason to stay with him, and that's false hope.
The moment he founds someone he wants to fight for, he will change for the better, but that won't be with you. Why would it? He can keep steeping over you and you'll only smile and tell him “That's great sweety? What do you want for dinner?”
At least cancel you internet connection or change the password to one he can't guess.