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so, just to be clear, he was okay with receiving a decidedly one-sided sexual act without you receiving pleasure? is that right?
my answer overall is, it varies. extremely insecure people will feel extremely insecure. if you are having to use a vibe/dildo for most/all of your sexual acts, you're either completely incompatible or need to talk about how to GIVE EACH OTHER pleasure equally to satisfy each other.
if he's upset you're making yourself cum while making HIM cum, i would personally seriously reconsider the arrangement entirely. either we both discuss our sexual needs and expectations and go from there, or i am gone. the end. he is either selfish, extremely insecure, or both, and i don't have time for that. he can play with your pussy or let you find a way. the end.
He sounds like a narcissist to me. After having several experiences with this type of man I suggest you run fast and far and cut all contact when you do. This is the type of man who will destroy your fucking life at his convenience. This guy sounds so toxic and horrible I honestly can’t even believe you’re with him. And he’s gaslighting you by trying to make you feel bad for calling him out on being an absolute liar. He chose to lie about having a life-threatening condition. He took away your choice over your own body. To me, I consider that assault. And can you even really believe what he says about what the doctor told him? For all we know that’s another lie and he just doesn’t wanna use a condom and doesn’t care enough about your health and safety to do so. Get away from this guy before he ruins your fucking life. You don’t owe him an explanation. You can literally send a break up text and block him. Because I guarantee when you go to break up with him it’s going to be dramatic and manipulative and he’ll say whatever you want to hear to keep you staying with him. I really hope you make it out of this without being collateral damage for a narcissist.
Tell her you can't date a 21F that's so jealous of her 16yo sister that she would make up something like this. This could be SERIOUS. You dont want to be anywhere near this girl.
There's no manual for women's bodies that says they should optimally reach orgasm after a certain amount of time or a certain type of stimulation. He's telling on himself that he's not patient or attentive enough to help you get there.