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If you're hiding the fact that you're going to dinner with friends from him, then I see no point to continue being with this greedy A-hole. This reminds me of a post I saw a long time ago about a wife and her young daughter borderline starving because the husband wouldn't stop eating all the food… And when confronted, he of course took no accountability. Don't let that be your future.
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Oh, I know haha hence the “overly”.. You could've been nasty with it but chose not to, so I'm grateful nonetheless:) I'll take my sore sorry ass as motivation to do right by the friendship I treasure
. I called her and told her, I can send a friend in Kenya money, so she can go grocery shopping with him if she's really in need. She called me all kinds of names and was overall rude and entitled.
The issue isn't her, it's your husband. So he likes going for younger women, he most likely enjoyed his ex being reliant on him to some extent, he likes playing knight in a shining armour.
In your shoes, I'd separate my finances from him, and make it clear that individual and couple's counseling is a must.